2) Sheer carelessness. Like, reading quickly and missing an important caveat, or failing to check for context
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Thinking back on stuff I've gotten wrong, & trying to categorize into reasons. An incomplete list: 1) Interpreting someone's claim in a more unreasonable way than they meant it, and neglecting to search for other, more reasonable interpretations before responding
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3) Assuming we were talking about the same thing just because we were using the same word
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4) Citing a fact that I've heard other people claim, without checking it myself, and later learning either they were wrong or I misremembered
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I find the best solution is to create the "steel man" - what is the strongest and best possible interpretation of an argument? This is a counter to the common "straw man fallacy."
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Tell us more....
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How about, "interpreting someone's claim in a more reasonable way than they meant it?"
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Isn't this steelmanning, and hence a good thing?
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It's good to know what the best argument for a position is, but if you're wrong about what someone thinks, you're wrong about something potentially important. Once, I was talking to an older married couple about foreign policy. They didn't seem super coherent to me, but I kept
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Trying to work out why they thought it would be a good idea to bomb the hell out of Iraq during the insurgency. After some confusion on my part, one of them, with great relish, related the myth of a bunch of muslims being terrified into peace by soldiers shooting other Muslims
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Assuming good intentions is truly the first step. For some reason, some popular people are eroding that. I wanna know why.
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Worth a look into nonviolent communication, it addresses this specific issue
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Julia, how can you be so self aware and keep that smile? Kids, don't try this at home.
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Thank you. This seems like a really useful (but psychologically painful maybe) exercise for self improvement. Any tips on your process for doing this and finding reasons without succumbing to self justification? Thanks
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My whole work life depends on other people committing #2. When I do it, others jump on it right away.
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I wonder how much misunderstanding arises from confusions in language/meaning, vs. truly irreconcilable ideological differences.
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#1 is super common. Even more egregious when you know that person well. It's almost seems like wilfull misunderstanding.
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I do these things also-I'm trying to slow down and be more thoughtful
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