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"What if everything in the world were a misunderstanding, what if laughter were really tears?" --- Søren Kierkegaard, Either/Or: A Fragment of Life
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Same here. I learned as a child to make jokes out of all the pain and suffering I encountered. I still do it. That film Joker resonates with a lot of people on a lot of different levels...
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I used to laugh a lot when I was younger, in my teenage years, when I was with people, friends and families. Those laughs were real and I was truly happy. I guess that has stuck with me as a skin of habit that I can't tear up in front of people.
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Oh how I wish for some alcohol! Too bad it's not legal here. Tried smoking and surprise: I can't even get addicted to nicotine! What the fuck is wrong with me!
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You have to get in the habit of smoking tobacco before an addiction sets in. I chain smoked for years. Non-smoker, now. No alcohol? Are you in a Muslim country?
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