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You're not doing anything wrong. You're guilting yourself for taking it easy when taking it easy is the way to go. Maintain the bare essentials. And let the rest of it go until ya feel like it. You got it together, actually. You just dont realize it yet.
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That's what I'm talkin about. You're too hard on yourself. Overachieve? Why? Everything in life is just castles made of sand & will not last. The best thing is to do what has to be done & the rest of the time go chasing clouds & rainbows. Smell the flowers.
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I got critters all over the place. I live in a forest. I hear em walkin around out there at night. You get used to it after a while. But the lightning bugs were sparse this year. I don't know if they're declining or not. They say honeybees are rebounding.
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I think that one's called a Tiger Swallowtail. There are at least a half dozen species out there on any given day. There are some smaller species, too, but they also might be moths. I'm not sure. I just like watching them.