You're not doing anything wrong. You're guilting yourself for taking it easy when taking it easy is the way to go. Maintain the bare essentials. And let the rest of it go until ya feel like it. You got it together, actually. You just dont realize it yet.
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That's what I'm talkin about. You're too hard on yourself. Overachieve? Why? Everything in life is just castles made of sand & will not last. The best thing is to do what has to be done & the rest of the time go chasing clouds & rainbows. Smell the flowers.
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Look. You know all is vanity, right? This life thing aint goin nowhere. Every time you feel the need to be perfect, remind yourself existence is pointless. Then, let it go, relax and say "fuck it". Do things that make you feel good. Feeling good is not bad.
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You're actually in a good place, you know... economically, you got no kids, good health & so on. Your biggest problem is your own mind beating you up for shit that doesn't matter. We exist only a short time. Have as much fun as possible. Laugh at the world.
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You should die when it's time for you to die. You can't rush these things. There's a time and place for everything. In the meantime, take it easy and enjoy the ride.
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What I mean is it's not time for you to die yet. If u try to rush it, you'll fuck it up. So, hold off on that for now. When it's time for you to die, then you'll go. It's called Fate. & you can't fuck with Fate. U have to flow with it. It's just the way it is
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Uh, oh... I hope that's a good thing... 😆
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Obviously, you are mistaken. If it had been time for you to go, you would have.
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