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Jemima Kelly
@jemimajoanna
Columnist . Formerly/forever . Best known for snark, sarc & Sark. “Bus passenger”. “Notorious fiat scammer”. "Great power". 😎
London, Englandft.comBorn May 25Joined January 2012

Jemima Kelly’s posts

Trump, March 16th: "We have a problem that a month ago nobody knew anything about." Trump, March 17th: "I felt it was a pandemic long before it was declared a pandemic. All you had to do was look at other countries."
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Replying to @JanPostmaUSA
Trump: “I felt it was a pandemic long before it was declared a pandemic.”
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Bitcoin now down almost a quarter since El Salvador's president "bought the dip" last month. That's over $3 million down the drain just in that last round of buying, in a country where 1 in 4 live below the poverty line
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El Salvador just bought the dip! 🇸🇻 500 coins at an average USD price of ~$30,744 🥳 #Bitcoin
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Oh dear oh dear, I must apologise profusely for not being drawn from "the sort of people" who know the grouse-shooting season ended two weeks ago. For shame!
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Howdy from deepest Texas, where it is hotter than 99% of the Earth’s surface right now and where you can get a starting salary of $125k to work as a car wash manager with no experience necessary
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I can't believe I've only just discovered that on Trump's Twitter clone Truth Social, retweeting is called "ReTruthing". Seems apt
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lol, andreessen was actually following me until i dared to point out that he said in 2014 that bitcoin was like the internet in 1994, and then said 5 years later that bitcoin was like the internet in 2012... fReE sPeEcH tho innit
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OK so the tabloids have worked out that I'm a "woman", and a "bus passenger", which are both correct. But they don't seem to have done a quick Google search on me to find out what I do for a living? "She told the Financial Times"
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YEAH! WHY CAN'T SOMEONE JUST GIVE ME MORE EDUCATIONAL MATERIALS TO HELP ME LEARN HOW TO GAMBLE
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There would be more women investing in bitcoin if they had more educational materials to help them, a new report found. @paddybaker_ @GrayscaleInvest ow.ly/gcGv50xBvsG
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Head of the world's biggest crypto exchange admits banks are needed to "keep driving adoption", quite literally describing the process by which people are drawn into a Ponzi scheme He's also the man who recently described Matt Hancock as an "expert in crypto" The grift is real
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Replying to @cz_binance
Banks vs crypto has been raging since Satoshi published the Bitcoin whitepaper in 2008. The reality is banks provide a critical role in the crypto ecosystem. We need them to keep driving adoption, which is why we support their increasing involvement in the development of crypto.
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Hey Elon, you need to stop with this. It's serious and you don't know what you're talking about, and some of your 32m followers think you do.
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Replying to @elonmusk and @PPathole
Based on current trends, probably close to zero new cases in US too by end of April
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Despite the fact that Melania and the Trump kids are on TRUTH Social, The Donald himself doesn't follow any of them. In fact he only follows 3 accounts - 2 official TRUTH Social accounts, and this guy - John Daly, a golfer who calls him "Daddy Trump". It is a strange, sad site.
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Today feels like an appropriate day to re-share some stories from our "What's the Tory crypto story?" series, like this one from Feb 18th (the donation was made Feb 9th) What's the story, blockchain Tory? ft.com/content/37b8c1
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The Tories got "a £500,000 donation from a British crypto investor two months before the government pledged to make the UK 'the very best place in the world' to build crypto businesses." (In news that will surprise no one.) fnlondon.com/articles/crypt
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OK I'm ready to say it: Barbie is not very good, and America Ferreira's "empowering" monologue is the absolute pits. I mean what kind of washed up version of feminism is this? Aren't we meant to have realised by now it's hard to be a man too? Maybe it's just hard being...a human?
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Wow, so a Pulitzer-prize winning LA Times columnist calls my piece a POS, quote-tweeting CJR's public editor for the NYT calling me a "blogger desperate for content". My point about the liberal media's instinct to suppress any negative coverage of Biden is clearly way off 🙄
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Better question: Why did a creditable publication like the FT publish this POS? twitter.com/gabrielsnyder/…
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just so many really quite bleak layers to this from a *sitting president* aren't there
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Most people go in when the price is up, but the safest and most profitable moment to buy is when the price is down. It’s not rocket science 🤷🏻‍♂️ So invest a piece of your McDonald’s paycheck in #Bitcoin Now go back to flip more burgers you lazy fvçk!
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I have just received this Christmas card from my 12-year-old nephew Maxim. He has somehow managed to perfectly capture both my daily life and my constant thoughts.
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The column was about Oxbridge, not your book Matt, as I told you on the phone, and as you can see in the fuller screenshot below. I still have no intention to read your book, I'm afraid, and didn't pass judgement on it in the column either. Zzzzz indeed. ft.com/content/d7275a
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Another classic New Elite response to my book. It's "jealousy" - he just wants to be like us! After asking me if I'd ever applied to Oxbridge the author Jemima Kelly then admitted to me she'd not actually read the book. Zzzzzz. You can read it here -> amzn.to/41uuPjI
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Why on earth has removed this clip of speaking? Whatever you think of his views, the ones being expressed here are not extreme or dangerous in any way. What is dangerous, particularly at a time like this, is censorship.
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"Jemima Kelly may not believe that Bitcoin is quintessentially different from other cryptocurrencies but the results over the long term speak for themselves: Bitcoin has the longest track record of 'number go up' technology" NUMBER GO UP TECHNOLOGY🤣🤣🤣
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I know this is from April but I was out of the country and this has just come to my attention. Here is CZ, who runs the biggest crypto exchange in the world, calling *checks notes* MATT HANCOCK "an expert in crypto"
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Had a great chat with @MattHancock a month ago in London. He is an expert in crypto, and have a forward thinking mindset. Great to see him pushing crypto adoption. 👏👏👏 twitter.com/MattHancock/st…
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