irfan sharif

@irfansharifm

engineering . engineering. past search, storage, distributed sql, prod eng. foremost scholar.

living room
irfansharif.io
Joined October 2012
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  1. 8 hours ago

    after my first Costco trip today (!!!) I find myself irrationally excited at the prospect of buying a year's supply of paper towels to recoup Costco membership fees.

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  2. Aug 21

    my brother is interning in NY next semester and watching him look for housing there is giving me PTSD

    1 reply 1 like
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  3. Aug 18

    databases with multiple consistency models over-ridable on a per request basis give me the heebie jeebies

    1 reply 1 like
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  4. Aug 17

    I can't word why but not knowing anything about Douglas Adams, I'd have still pegged him to being English.

    1 like
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  5. Aug 12

    Team Djikstra Was Wrong About GOTOs

    1 like
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  6. Aug 7

    Google Play reviews for "elite" apps with people fuming over lack of matches is my new favorite genre

    1 like
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  7. Retweeted
    26 Oct 2016

    Happy birthday to this future president.

    16,578 replies 57,913 retweets 115,933 likes
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  8. Jul 29

    where do I submit my application to become an instagram influencer

    1 reply 4 likes
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  9. Jul 28

    I've now changed my position on not capitalizing at the start of sentences to exclude the first person pronoun 'I'. thank you

    1 like
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  10. Jul 26

    for all this talk of diversity tech companies espouse, there's rarely if ever any push for non bay-area engineering offices, something that'd probably be far more effective than their other efforts.

    1 reply 8 likes
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  11. Jul 24

    had to write this completely inane paper for some stupid course but surprised at how legit looking the final outcome is

    1 reply 3 likes
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  12. Jul 23

    silly but my first time realizing my financial self-sufficiency was when I first bought aisle side chocolates without needing to ask parents lol

    1 reply 2 likes
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  13. Jul 20

    excited to say this fall I'll be interning at LinkedIn to bring snapchat stories to your newsfeeds hashtag synergy

    5 likes
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  14. Jul 20

    I'm actually surprised how often familiarity with the CockroachDB codebase has come clutch. Evidently every problem I need second opinions on has already been solved there in some way shape or form.

    5 likes
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  15. Jul 18

    I'm always more comfortable with pictures of myself from a few weeks ago than those taken the day of, not sure if I'm always reacting to photo vs. mirror difference or just constantly getting uglier

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  16. Jul 17

    filled with existential dread, purchasing football jerseys now for players notably younger can no longer 'aspirational' (realistically no different than before but still)

    1 like
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  17. Jul 16

    closing in on my window of time to impregnate someone so as to graduate as a single parent with a child

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  18. Jul 13

    learning that I'm surprisingly susceptible to shows with a large group of attractive people in their mid-20s ever dramatically finding true love on a vacation island in contest form with weekly eliminations

    1 reply 1 like
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  19. Jul 6

    peanuts in biryani is fantastic fight me on this

    1 reply 3 likes
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  20. Retweeted
    Jul 3

    Can’t help but feel everything would be fine now if this fucking kid had written “2 goals”

    65 replies 2,284 retweets 11,632 likes
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