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la petite bort Retweeted
just saw a Bloomberg ad where he goes into a deli and orders a “chopped cheese with extra soft fries” , then he asks if he can eat it in the bathroom. And he opens up the sandwich and he says “I’ve been eating like this for 40 years.” Then he tries to smile and says “I’m mike”
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la petite bort Retweeted
This is how you know you’ve officially “made it”. My hotel has a frickin’ soda stream.pic.twitter.com/Yl5dHQbi3K
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congratulations to the Times on firing David Brooks and replacing him with the mom from "Home Alone"pic.twitter.com/BiGcPAXWb2
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as a Never Gump Republican i am the mortal enemy of Gary Sinise
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"The real value of your $345 watch is the friends you made along the way"pic.twitter.com/CWu9Fa72CP
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if i wrote star trek i would have one of the characters eat dippin' dots to show that it takes place in the future
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everyone talks about the films at Sundance but nobody talks about the Festival, which consists of a Gravitron, a bunch of balloon pop races, a Zeppole stand, and a petting zoo
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everyone loves "Shitposting" but the public is unanimously against "Post-shitting" where I ambush people coming out of public restroom stalls and ask searing questions about what makes them tick
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every time something is called hogwash it only serves to deepen my confusion about what hogwash is
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in my opinion, the best state building is Empire
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la petite bort Retweeted
is neil armstrong really strong? probberly because his last name explaines it all to me
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mr peanut died on the toilet
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the new york times has endorsed a human centipede of elizabeth warren and amy klobuchar for president
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can't wait wait for ben garrison's drawing of a jacked alan dershowitz and ken starr
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As a veteran of working Customer Service, the only perfect phone call is the one where a customer calls up extremely indignant, is immediately proven demonstrably wrong, and then apologizes for being an idiot
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I JUST GOT BANNED FROM THE GAMEFAQS FORUMS FOR MAKING A PERFECT POSThttps://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1217909231946477575 …
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put tom steyer in smash
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la petite bort Retweeted
a weird thing about this whole discourse is the idea that republicans just don't Care about the country. they do! and they think the best thing to do to show that care is to deport and murder minorities and restrict democracy to give themselves power to rulehttps://twitter.com/ezraklein/status/1217643443003899904 …
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did bartles and jaymes ever fuck
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I would NEVER force a bot to do ANYTHING
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