It's a good question. My guess is it's a mix of both. It's probably genuinely harder for boys to manage themselves to do the work to learn, but also they're likely to be less willing to do so.
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Replying to @GeniesLoki
my fear is just that a bad system trying to make people better will make them worse; would hate if girls do better in school bc they have a smaller sense of agency and we reacted by “helping” boys have less agency too.
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Replying to @maybegray
Yeah my actual preferred policy solution doesn't really look like the originating take. I do think there are some ways in which girls do better. I do think there are some ways boys do better. I'm not really sure what to do about it, but think we're failing both.
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Replying to @GeniesLoki @maybegray
One tricky thing is that the ways boys have more agency is not actually good for them in the long run, because it leads directly into the individualistic thing where men can't talk about their feelings
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Replying to @GeniesLoki @maybegray
Individualism and talking about feelings are compatible. How does agency directly lead to not being able to talk about one's feelings? I would have thought it would make it easier.
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most peoples conception of individualism is that it means not relying on other people given that you are not relying on someone, telling them your feelings is usually counterproductive at best relying on people is a sign that you aren't capable of standing on your own
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Replying to @imhinesmi @reasonisfun and
men are expected to be able to deal with their emotions on their own, but are never taught how hence lots of bottling and denial
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Agree with that, but don't see how it follows directly from being taught agency. The cause seems more like being punished for expressing feelings—not being encouraged to be an individual. It may be the other way around: individualism cultivated to deal with emotional isolation.
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individualism != agency individualism means not needing others to do things for you obviously this isn't how society actually works, but we still have the memeplex of "you shouldn't need to depend on other people for basic needs" emotional regulation is pretty basic-seeming
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Replying to @imhinesmi @reasonisfun and
(i do think emotions are Hard, but its a skill everyone supposedly picks up so it looks easy to learn)
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plenty of agentic things are not individuals plenty of individuals are not agentic often the best move for an goal-oriented agenty individual is to stop being an individual and join a group
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Lulie Retweeted GeniesLoki
fwiw I used those words interchangeably because I was replying to this tweet, where they were being treated as one or one path: https://twitter.com/geniesloki/status/1244266346298441728?s=21 …https://twitter.com/GeniesLoki/status/1244266346298441728 …
Lulie added,
0 replies 0 retweets 1 likeThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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