Underappreciated great thing about poly: it hugely simplifies relationships between people who are in love but who are sexually incompatible. E.g. I know a gay man married to a woman, a number of asexual people in relationships with sexual people, and they're fine because poly
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It's not that poly solves problems in and of itself (and it certainly can create problems), but it creates a space in which problems that would be intractable in monogamy are straightforwardly soluble.
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At its best, poly is just what happens when you take the idea that it is unreasonable to expect a romantic partner to fulfill all of your needs seriously and follow this to its reasonable conclusion.
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Replying to @GeniesLoki
I think it’s not widely enough recognized that almost everyone is in a poly relationship. That mother-in-law you don’t get on with but your spouse is deeply close to? She’s a secondary. Your spouse’s same-gender college friends they go on vacation once a year with? Secondaries.
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this feels like a really weird definition of poly its denying there are different types of r/ships mono society has a special reserved type of r/ship you can only have with one person dont want to argue about how/if that r/ship should be defined but an implicit defn exists
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