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Q: What did the proctologist say to his therapist? A: All day long I am dealing with assholes.
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My goldfish are named major, minor, Dorian, Lydian, and diminished. The only way I can tell them apart, is by their scales.
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Ran into Jeff Tweedy yesterday and told him I really enjoyed his book. He said thanks and then I said “yeah, it’s much better than the music.” He smiled at me, laughed and said “well I guess I’ll just keep writing books then.” Mission accomplished.
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Jacques Cousteau The Famous Scuba Diver - https://www.thelaughline.com/jacques-cousteau-the-famous-scuba-diver/ …
#jokes#humor#humour#hilarious#laughs Paddy and Seamus were watching an old documentary about Jacques Cousteau, the famous scuba diver and conservationist. Seamus turned t...pic.twitter.com/b116AEhAL1
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Too dangerous for the society. via /r/dankmemes Visit our Funny Dank Memes Blog: https://ift.tt/2Jmuh9R
#dankmemes#funnymemes#jokes star_o_mega pic.twitter.com/h4kXPrbPxb
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Plain out robbery from Williams
#jokes https://twitter.com/adamschefter/status/1224173234033168388 … -
BuzzFeed Journo Reportedly Blogged About
#Pedo Fantasies, Rape#Jokes And Doxing http://jenke.rs/Fb06Zd pic.twitter.com/b6IR4p4CZp
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Thoughts while out shopping today: "I'm gonna open a store called Hole Foods and it's only going to sell things that you can fuck or things that you can use to fuck yourself. With My clients, it will practically sell itself!" Don't forget to tip your Femdom xD
#jokes#humor pic.twitter.com/R2fqw36nB9
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lol. M is for HOPELESS.

#Jokes -
Bamboozled once again via /r/dankmemes Visit our Funny Dank Memes Blog: https://ift.tt/2Jmuh9R
#dankmemes#funnymemes#jokes ClassicDecimus12 pic.twitter.com/XW8VjGWURe
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Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq. — Fran Lebowitz | |
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When wife not at home . Husband-
#memesdaily#Trending#jokes pic.twitter.com/DAbqFHMlBY
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I went on a date last night with a girl from the zoo. It was great. She’s a keeper.

#jokes pic.twitter.com/KYcArqhPBq
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My wife asked me why I was whispering at home, I said that I was worried that Mark Zuckerberg was listening She laughed, I laughed, Alexa laughed, Siri laughed... we all laughed.
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What did the dentist say to the golfer? ? "You've got a hole in one" ?
#dentist#jokes pic.twitter.com/vJIaPznaCJ
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BUT FIRST DELETE THEM B**** idk what you take this for lol jp
#jokes



#goodmorningworld https://www.instagram.com/p/B8HEIjVgsRqGbD-B1Th2LGreJyLOoPfI_rUpB00/?igshid=xry48nm20rqy …
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