God

@god

Hells yeah, it's me!

heaven
Joined January 2007
63 Photos and videos Photos and videos

Tweets

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  1. Pinned Tweet
    17 Mar 2014

    Best fortune ever!

    2,392 retweets 4,387 likes
  2. Aug 7

    Trump's secret to good health...two white babies for breakfast every morning.

    261 retweets 475 likes
  3. Jul 28

    Actual door mat I noticed upon leaving my friend's house this AM. 2 out of 3 ain't bad.

    129 retweets 385 likes
  4. Jul 26

    Sometimes I feel like I'll never catch 'em all.

    236 retweets 406 likes
  5. Jul 14

    Touché!

    198 retweets 407 likes
  6. Jul 10

    "Recently I was walking through a park and a tree fell right in front of me... it didn't make a sound."

    38 retweets 146 likes
  7. Jun 19

    God Clarifies That He Still Hates Cleveland Fans Despite Cavaliers Championship

    3,147 retweets 4,490 likes
  8. Jun 19

    Congratulations , , !!!

    43 retweets 95 likes
  9. Jun 7

    BREAKING: is accusing of using math against him.

    93 retweets 245 likes
  10. Jun 7

    Poor , his dementia is getting so bad he keeps forgetting that he lost.

    111 retweets 221 likes
  11. May 11

    I think it's time for to change his adult diaper, go home, and enjoy his great-grandchildren.

    193 retweets 489 likes
  12. May 6

    It's sad that everyone has "all gender" bathrooms in their homes already, but Republicans still managed to make this an issue.

    752 retweets 1,426 likes
  13. Apr 2

    So true.

    1,035 retweets 1,286 likes
  14. Mar 27

    My son gets crucified, dies (duh) and comes back to life, and you people worship a fucking bunny for Easter?? Nice.

    914 retweets 1,964 likes
  15. Mar 20

    As dad is checking family into hotel, he says "I hope the porn is disabled." Guy at desk replies, "It's just regular porn, you sick fuck."

    744 retweets 1,496 likes
  16. Mar 15

    Proof that nipple tweakers existed long before J-Lo videos.

    205 retweets 442 likes
  17. Feb 27

    Word on the street is that is going to be dropping out of the race after the next primary!

    37 retweets 174 likes
  18. Feb 17

    I was all like, "baby, you ain't losing your virginity, your gaining your sexuality".

    280 retweets 504 likes
  19. Feb 17

    I can't believe people still believe in the "immaculate conception". I hit that and it was anything but immaculate when we finished.

    167 retweets 281 likes
  20. Feb 12

    In case you were wondering.

    1,594 retweets 2,212 likes
  21. God followed , , and 12 others

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