to clarify: I've started taking antidepressants today. a single low-dose SNRI. evidently it takes about an hour for the tablet to kick in.
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Replying to @fozmeadows
there was a thing that happened when I lived in the UK and bought a special Magic Science Light to help with my seasonal affective disorder
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Replying to @fozmeadows
where I turned the light on and, within minutes, felt a physical tingling sensation up the back of my neck, followed by spreading lightness
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Replying to @fozmeadows
a feeling I'd previously associated with the aesthetic pleasure of being outside on a nice day, but which I realised then was seratonin joy.
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Replying to @fozmeadows
what I'm feeling right now is very similar to that. there's the same localised tingling at the back of my head, the same spreading lightness
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Replying to @fozmeadows
but also a... I don't quite know how to describe it. a tightening of internal focus, somehow? I feel more present, but not quite calmly so.
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Replying to @fozmeadows
you know in a video game when the camera is lagging so you go into settings and up the speed, then start playing again? it feels like that.
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Replying to @fozmeadows
also, I'm assuming this is partly just an initial chemical shock, but I feel like I want to run. just, like, flat out RUN. or do SOMETHING.
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Replying to @fozmeadows
I'm not, because I still have a cold. but the flutteryness of it is notable. and just the all-over tingle.
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aaand... there's the headache side-effect kicking in. discernible as such by virtue of being very very different to my usual headaches.
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