Today is Thomas's third birthday! Happy birthday to my fluffy little blue asshole. May you live to be a hundred. #mainecoons #bestcats
@seananmcguire What if your cat is like a dragon, though, and just gets bigger and bigger the longer he lives? HE WILL DEVOUR YOU.
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@fozmeadows Nah, he'll just purr on me. He likes scritches too much to eat his pet human. -
@seananmcguire Also, if he got big enough, you could ride him to cons and train him to bop the insolent like whack-a-moles.
End of conversation
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