The Florida Virtual Curriculum, which my school is using, has replaced actual fairytales with godawful milquetoast versions that it’s nonetheless saying are fairytales and I am SCREAMING. Come with me on a journey. Here is what they have done to Hansel and Gretel: a thread.
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IT WOULD BE ONE THING TO SANITISE A FAIRYTALE BUT KEEP IT A FAIRYTALE, BUT THESE NEW VERSIONS *ARE NOT FAIRYTALES* AND THEY DON’T MAKE NARRATIVE SENSE. YOU CANNOT TEACH KIDS BASIC LITERARY ANALYSIS USING STORIES THIS BAD!
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Dear
@catvalente,@seananmcguire and@UrsulaV, please join me in SCREAMING INTO THE VOID at this crime against fairytales.Show this thread
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I have knitting needles. Can I join for some “you should be ashamed” poking??????
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1) The story is trying to teach respect for all authority 2) kids will see right through it. 3) when they experience good stories it will BLOW THEIR MINDS and they will beg borrow and steal for more. 4) Someone paid for this and they need smacking.
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4.5) Someone got paid for this and are probably laughing all the way to the bank
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May I recommend using an alligator gar for this?
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Make it a big one!
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Moral: Stay away from angry people inexplicably carrying a fish
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Please use a very large fish.
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This is exactly what I was thinking of. This sketch has always been one of my favourites.
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