One of the most heinous laws in the US is the statute of limitations that exists in various states on reporting child abuse. Older than 21 and live in New York? Too bad, you can no longer report your abuser, even if it took you your entire adolescence to feel safe enough.
-
-
Show this thread
-
That's an extreme and awful example, but I use it here to illustrate what should be a clear point: abuse of all flavours is hard for victims to deal with - hell, it can take years for victims to recognise they were abused at all, in some cases, which means years of issues.
Show this thread -
If someone mugged you ten years ago but was never caught, and then you run into them at a party and they're a successful, law-abiding professional now, THEY STILL FUCKING MUGGED YOU, and the argument that "oh, but they wouldn't do that NOW" doesn't change that.
Show this thread -
Here's the thing: it's very easy for someone to *say* they've changed when nobody's going to test them on it. Part of real, sincere change is accepting the consequences for your past bad actions - and if you're not willing to accept those consequences? THEN YOU HAVEN'T CHANGED.
Show this thread -
Lehner, from what I know of his situation, is an example of someone who *has* accepted the consequences of his past actions. He's admitted bad behaviour, sought help and education, and is now an advocate for others to do the same - and that's good! But:
Show this thread -
That's a VERY different situation from coaches like Babcock, Peters and Crawford, who've had DECADES in which to try and make amends for their past actions, but who've literally done nothing to change, apologise or help those they hurt, or even acknowledge the issue.
Show this thread -
Instead, they've shoved those incidents aside and happily accepted professional promotions and public accolades. Their only self-reflection has come through *fear of losing their status*, not genuine remorse for being abusive dickheads or causing harm.
Show this thread -
You can't even argue that these guys NEED to pretend the bad stuff never happened in order to keep their jobs - and therefore their income - for economic reasons, because THEY'RE FUCKING MILLIONAIRES. What they care about here is RETAINING money, status and power, not changing.
Show this thread -
The fact that Babcock has been, in recent years, an advocate of mental health issues, despite his history of verbally and psychologically abusing others... look. EVEN IF you wanted to argue this is his way of making amends, HE STILL NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED HIS PAST ACTIONS AS BAD.
Show this thread -
Has Babs ever reached out to Johan Franzen to try and apologise for giving him a nervous breakdown and contributing to his PTSD? Did his support of mental health causes ever involve saying out loud, on record, "I used to do terrible things without knowing they caused harm"?
Show this thread -
If you think the current coachocalypse in hockey is unfair because Peters (for example) was fired so long after the fact, ask yourself: would you feel the same if he'd done all that stuff this year? Because if not, your issue isn't with the time lag - it's with the consequences.
Show this thread -
And if your issue is with the consequences, then you need to examine why that is; or why, conversely, you think "getting away with abuse for years" somehow wins an abuser the bonus prize of being immune from consequences now when their victims are still being negatively impacted.
Show this thread -
Does the NHL need to implement a concrete education and rehabilitation program to deal with (and hopefully prevent) future abuse, as well as a much better reporting system that actually protects players from retaliation? Absolutely. But YOU STILL NEED CONSEQUENCES IN THE MOMENT
Show this thread -
Possibly, there are contexts in which "this person is abusive but we need to keep them OR THE SKY WILL FALL" is an argument to be entertained. But hockey isn't life or death. It's a sport, played for entertainment, and that's not worth destroying people over.
Show this thread
End of conversation
New conversation -
Loading seems to be taking a while.
Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.