In real terms, this is the emotional equivalent of putting someone on the spot by asking them for something in front of an audience, though done a different way: it's coercive, in that it preemptively isolates anyone who might disagree with or be hurt by what comes next.
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I'm not saying don't vent to your friends. I'm not even saying that having dark, angry thoughts about stuff is bad or makes you a bad person. But when you share those gremlin-thoughts, you *need* to acknowledge them as such, or show willing to have them labelled by others.
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Because if not, you're taking advantage of a social covenant - Arguing With The Venter Makes You An Asshole - to spew your own toxic gremlins onto others, thereby causing upset to the people who are trying to help you feel better.
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