oh nooo jr gonna get murdered by a Nekkid Tittyghost
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TEEN DAUGHTER'S SHIRT GETTING SCRATCHED OPEN TO THE BRA BY CAGEHEAD GHOST
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oh wait the fucking weird lesbian-energy Ghost Rights Activist is embeth davitz, the nekkid tittyghost is someone else, my bad
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"we're in the middle of a machine designed by the devil and powered by the dead" god bless this terrible scripte
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"can I rely on you not to get me killed?" "I guarantee nothing"
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love how all the adults are together and the kids are just like. Lost?? in the murderghost house? and this has someone ceased to be an immediate priority??
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"how do you lose an entire family in a glass house?" matthew jatthew lillard you are not HELPING
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ok honestly you know what? the whole dark zodiac soul engine concept is genuinely cool and deserving of a much better movie
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I'll say this for thirteen ghosts, at least it has the common goddamn decency to pass the bechdel test and not have the sole black character die first
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they are deadass carrying an ENTIRE PLATE GLASS WINDOW around as a ghost shield, I am DYING
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y'know, we don't see much of embeth davitz anymore. why is that? did she just decide to do other things or did some hollywood sleezeball blacklist her for ignoring his boner?
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OH PLOT TWIST, EMBETH GHOST ACTIVIST WAS IN ON IT WITH CYRUS, WHO ISN'T DEAD AND NOW HE'S BETRAYING HER BACK
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or like, I assume he's about to betray her back, what with being not dead and called cyrus and all
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RIP matthew lillard, your body is dead but your scenery-chewing lives on
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love how embeth ghost activist was apparently down for endangering the kids until cyrus explicitly told her to Do It Herself and APPARENTLY that's like, one step too far even tho they're already LOST IN A MURDERGHOST HOUSE
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not gonna lie, it's hard to take dad's pathos seriously when he's crying while wearing terrible plastic ghostglasses
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aaaaand THERE'S THE BETRAYAL, cyrus squeezed embeth to death between two glass walls like a stone-cold BIATCH
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yes, we certainly needed a several-minutes long recap of this Extremely Complex Plot right at the finale,
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ROFL SHE FUCKED UP THE SOUNDSYSTEM AND NOW THE MACHINE IS BROKEN AND THE GHOSTS ARE ANGERY AT CYRUS
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aww, ghost matthew lillard smiling knowingly from beyond the grave
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WELP, that was certainly a movie that I watched of my own free will
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