Honestly, geek dudes calling people with extensive personal, professional & historical knowledge of female geeks liars - because if the DUDE has never seen them, then they can't POSSIBLY exist - is the ultimate in, "What are you gonna believe: what you see or what I tell you?"
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I've never endorsed the concept before now, but I'm pretty tempted to say that the sole defining criteria of "fake geek" is "someone who thinks that female geeks are an unobtanium-level rarity."
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Like, I mean. EVEN IF you want to play exclusively by the Macho Geek Exclusionary Rules of what constitutes geekiness and discount female cosplayers, crafters and fanwriters, of whom there are a *really large fucking number,* women are uhhhh.... Not Exactly In Short Supply, Guys.
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Anyone who has stirred out of doors for any sort of physical geek convention experience in the recent past would have to be either massively blinkered or furiously biased not to notice how many women go to cons. If you're at a con with zero women? That con is toxic as FUCK.
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I am deadly serious about this. Even the most conservative, sexist, hostile-to-women geek environments still attract at least SOME women if they're midsize or bigger, because there will always be ladies who love geek stuff more than they hate male bullshit.
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But if your small local or emerging startup con is aggressively male-only? Then it's being run and promoted via exclusively male geek networks of the kind that women have either learned to avoid, or which are actively hostile to female involvement, or both.
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If you're a dude who thinks that majority-male geekdom is an obvious, neutral, observable fact with no sexism involved whatsoever, and you respond to a woman saying "I'm a geek, and I know tons of women like me," with disbelief or mockery? Then sorry: you are, in fact, sexist.
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Why? Because, aside from the inherent discounting of geeky female *creators* this claim exhibits, you're basically telling a person, "Your stated lived experience is different to mine, which means you're either lying, an incompetent judge of your own life, or ignorant."
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And no, people who claim female geeks exist are NOT making this exact same argument about their detractors, because we all know goddamn well that all-male geek enclaves exist. That fact isn't in dispute: we're just pointing out that they're not the norm or the majority.
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If I tell someone, "You're not alone," and they reply with, "I am, because you don't really exist the way you're claiming to," those are not equivalent arguments. Like. This is 101 shit, people.
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I don't have the time or energy to write out an entire history of women in fannish & geeky spaces - it's late, and I need to talk myself out of watching another episode of My Hero Academia before bed - but goddamn, YOU ARE ON THE LITERAL INTERNET, YOU ASSHOLES, FUCKING GOOGLE IT.
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Replying to @fozmeadows
My go-to is "if it wasn't for a female-led letter campaign, we wouldn't have gotten a third season of Star Trek. Shut the heck up".
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