Adding to this, I've been setting boundaries for myself lately and it's improved my mental health greatly. 80% of the time I just don't have the energy to carry full convos due to the way my brain works (which I won't go into too much detail about, but if you know, you know).
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Sometimes I just want to post a thing and go about my day. It doesn't always have to be an invitation to a conversation because the majority of the time I just don't have it in me to conversate.
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Sometimes I am forced into these situations when I am tagged in threads or have old pictures of me reposted, and if I don't interact or reply to them then that just pisses people off. I don't even know how to really go about addressing this without being blunt about it.
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But this sort of setup to get me talking when people want me to talk makes me uncomfortable in situations where I do not want to talk at all. And if I ignore these requests, then I'm seen as a bad friend. There's really no win-win situation for me because of my disorder.
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I wish that I could describe this more in detail, but it's a very strange feeling. Not even in a sad way at all, but I am honestly, truly better and mentally healthier when I am alone. I have and will make time for friends, but I have to be in the correct mindset for it.
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Sometimes that mindset of mine isn't available when people want my attention, which causes me to freeze up and just hide until I can get my flow back. I wish more people understood the boundaries I put up without seeing me as a bad person. I've lost many friends over it.
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I'm glad that I saw the tweet that I RT'd about this because I was originally planning on writing a twitlonger on this today. Perfect timing. And if you've stuck around throughout the years and can still tolerate me, thank you. I am trying, really.
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