Right, I think so too. What I mean is, I suspect average preferences have a lot to do with normativity made possible by large differences in scale of audience size, and little to do with essential generalizable preferences.
So, in this example, the foundation of that person's incel identity would be shattered by meeting just one Danny Devito fetishist. And, of course, that's on the normal end.
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(I mean also it's naive realism & lack of self-awareness & lack of empathy etc but that's literally every other group that people are willing to kill on behalf of have those problems too)
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