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vibe-free lifestyle purveyor
@ellaguro
she/her. musician, writer, weird vidgame person. lefty art podcaster. fuck web3/NFTs. av image by John Chae
NYCellaguro.comJoined March 2009

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same here. all i can say is, if you want to receive updates on things i've done, by far the best way is to do that is subscribe to my Patreon: patreon.com/ellaguro
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I’ve been seeing a lot of bullshit about telling artists to “diversify their social media presence”, which like, do you want me to make art or not? Because just posting here and Instagram and discord already takes up a lot of my day.
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i do think music is the most taken for granted and overall devalued form of media, in spite of being so central to people's lives. because again... people just expect it to always be there. they can't seem to see it through the lens of the emotional energy it actually takes.
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the thing with music is everyone just expects it to be always there, but very few people seem to understand the amount of actual work it takes to make. so many people seem to think making music is this fun wacky experience and not something that is really intense and draining.
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it should tell you something that i ended up finding blogging to be a more fruitful enterprise than trying to compose for games, which is what i originally intended when i entered the space. no one reads blogs anymore!!!
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sound is almost always the most neglected/mistreated/misunderstood part of game development from my experience. everyone takes it for granted and there's little stability. composers and sound designers almost always seem to be contactors even in the most successful cases
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i could go on about this. game devs often seem confused/taken aback when you want to work closer with them and get specific info about the game in order to help establish the tone of the music. the attitude is often like: "can't you just spit out a bunch of tunes?"
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oh man... a lot of stuff here feels eerily familiar. this is 100% why i don't try to compose music for games outside small/friend projects. people treat composers like shit & expect you to be a magic music machine who can intuit everything they're thinking
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Marty Stratton, @idSoftware Studio Director, lied about @DOOM Eternal's OST events in a Reddit post that used disinformation to blame me entirely for its failure Later, he offered me a six-figure sum to never speak about it The truth is more important. link.medium.com/USjGbPeBOub
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striking how disconnected the dominant political media narrative of this election cycle - a red wave driven by inflation, “defend democracy” not being a mobilizing message, and voter fear of rising crime and defund the police demogauging - seems to have been from reality
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my theory with this is - people are overidentifying with increasingly diverse celebs who preach hustle culture and are going in an increasingly right wing/anti "cancel culture" direction - increased scapegoating of LGBTQ people - conspiracy shit growing
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it is wild to me that they are doing this while running the most blatantly racist campaign since idk, Wallace in 1968? but it's working jacobin.com/2022/11/gop-ri
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i voted. polling place was pretty empty, as it has been the last few times i've voted. i assume cuz of all the early voting here and the fact that it's the middle of a weekday in a less high density neighborhood. but yeah. plz vote if you haven't.
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There are a lot of interesting things going on in this thread, but one thing I would like to highlight is that this is a story about how engineers refused to build a privacy-invasive product for advertisers AND IT DID NOT GET BUILT.
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With Twitter's change in ownership last week, I'm probably in the clear to talk about the most unethical thing I was asked to build while working at Twitter. 🧵
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anyway that's why i can't find stuff like this surprising anymore. a lot of these people really acted like they were gods who would be immortal. there are several who i think are really capable of any and all insanity like this -
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when i lived in the SF Bay area in the early 2010's it definitely felt like there were a lot of (at the time still) celebrated tech figures who were about 5% away from going into full fascism and it felt like no one with any proximity to that world wanted to acknowledge it at all
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sorry if you can't face it, but that's the truth. people do these kinds of things to their own children behind closed doors way more than you think you do. people's inability to face this means that we have a society constantly searching for new unrelated boogeymans to target
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after coming to terms with being a CSA survivor myself in my early 20's... it just made me more aware how common it was, and how in almost all cases i heard from other people who were sexually abused it was their parent (or close relative) who did it
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the point is that it's not just about trans kids. it goes way beyond that. it's about parents wanting to control their child's life, and being unwilling to face that they are by far the most likely cause of their own child's suffering.
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my parents have never really even admitted to being abusive in general, let alone this kind of stuff. i think a lot of this moral panic about trans kids and "groomers" is parents unwilling to face they are by far the most common abusers of kids
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My hope for parents who abuse or neglect their trans children in the hope that they desist is not that they face revenge or suffering but that they come to understand the harm they've done and find the courage to tell others about it.
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a lot of those people changed their tune once the money started drying up of course. which... i know having principles doesn't seem to get you anything in this world, but at least i get to publicly shame these people for the way they got in bed with morally dubious tech figures
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currently thinking about the amount of successful indie developer dudes who preached ideas of meritocracy in order to wield against anyone who was critical of the landscape while receiving support behind the scenes from various rich tech people.
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same here. all i can say is, if you want to receive updates on things i've done, by far the best way is to do that is subscribe to my Patreon: patreon.com/ellaguro
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I’ve been seeing a lot of bullshit about telling artists to “diversify their social media presence”, which like, do you want me to make art or not? Because just posting here and Instagram and discord already takes up a lot of my day.
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this is really sad to hear =(. Vangers is an absolutely one of a kind game
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the head developer for vangers and perimeter has died in an accident in kaliningrad. he was a legendary figure in russian gamedev circles, and both of his games are masterpieces. a real tragedy dtf-ru.translate.goog/life/1430918-p
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if it's consistently the worst people who seem to have success and be celebrated in this world vs. those with actual principles, more and more people out there will emulate them in order to do what they feel they need to to survive
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