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eleanorkpenny's profile
Eleanor Penny
Eleanor Penny
Eleanor Penny
@eleanorkpenny

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Eleanor Penny

@eleanorkpenny

Writer. Anti-Zionist pro-bimbo. #LondonWritersAwards2021. 📚’Mercy’ out now. Writes jokes for TV. Do @novaramedia, host @goodbyeworldpod. Agent: @harriet__moore

London, England
eleanorpenny.com
Joined May 2011

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    Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 15 Aug 2018

    Your personal brand is the most stupid way in which you’ve accidentally injured yourself.

    1:24 AM - 15 Aug 2018
    • 2,410 Retweets
    • 21,774 Likes
    • q~uee~n Alice de Sampaio Kalkuhl belle Brandy 💕‘Fatgum & Tengen Usui’s TradWife’ desiree riah ✨ Tim Ellis, Wearing Exclusively N95 Masks 🌹 maggie (she/her) gio⁷ ₍˶ˆ꒳ˆ˶₎ 。⋆:+°♡*゚
    8,991 replies 2,410 retweets 21,774 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 15 Aug 2018

        I applaud the number of submissions which involve an urgent and indefatigable urge to snack

        32 replies 28 retweets 2,854 likes
        Show this thread
      3. Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 15 Aug 2018

        you're all so dumb, I love you

        9 replies 113 retweets 2,922 likes
        Show this thread
      4. Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 15 Aug 2018

        According to one of the solutions to Fermi’s Paradox, we haven’t made contact with extra terrestrial life because intelligent life has the tendency to destroy itself. Thanks to you lot I find that solution increasingly convincing.

        29 replies 269 retweets 2,863 likes
        Show this thread
      5. Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 16 Aug 2018

        You’re 👏the👏reason👏the👏aliens👏won’t👏talk👏to👏us

        15 replies 91 retweets 1,488 likes
        Show this thread
      6. Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 16 Aug 2018

        I see Daily Mail journos responding to this, so whilst I don’t have a soundcloud link to drop I do want to take this opportunity to say fuck the Daily Mail.

        17 replies 46 retweets 2,561 likes
        Show this thread
      7. Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 17 Aug 2018

        I’m in a state of perma-cringe from which I expect never to recover. Tell my family I died with honour.

        3 replies 5 retweets 513 likes
        Show this thread
      8. End of conversation
      1. lauren‏ @laurenbowes 15 Aug 2018
        Replying to @eleanorkpenny

        when i was a child i cut my foot open jumping on a bed (yeah, a soft mattress and duvet). thus ended all glee in my life

        13 replies 10 retweets 514 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. SuperMark‏ @mark_brophy 15 Aug 2018
        Replying to @eleanorkpenny

        I'm the only person who ever lost at Shadow boxing - dislocated my shoulder, tko.

        9 replies 56 retweets 1,219 likes
      3. Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 15 Aug 2018
        Replying to @mark_brophy

        You should see the other guy

        3 replies 3 retweets 605 likes
      4. Show replies
      1. New conversation
      2. Hannah Taaffe‏ @hannahtaaffe 15 Aug 2018
        Replying to @eleanorkpenny

        Just after we first got Cassie I was taking her for a walk & at one point there was a bit of a hill, so I joyfully ran over it with her - but sadly I tripped and fell, cut open my knee, dropping the lead. Cass was so alarmed that she ran all the way home (me chasing behind)

        5 replies 2 retweets 216 likes
      3. Eleanor Penny‏ @eleanorkpenny 15 Aug 2018
        Replying to @hannahtaaffe

        😢😢😢 ALARMED. Also yes this is you.

        1 reply 0 retweets 39 likes
      4. Show replies

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