sometimes I'm doing technical work and I get slammed with a sense of surrealness not impostor syndrome exactly, but rather \
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how boring would it be though if it were too predictable or slow?
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oh I'm not complaining! it's good I think? maybe? idk I've been really morbid about ageing since I read IT when I was twelve
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I've found lately that to orient myself when I'm "lost" in work, I reimagine, sort of simulate from my beginning to now
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to get a stronger grip, get a bit more stable, wherever I am.. even if it's at a desk
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