working on a theory re: apologies and such specifically I get the sense that people have come to misunderstand apologies. I don't entirely understand them myself but I want to spitball
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and i don't think this is a fear that is unfounded! it is a pity though because this means no one apologizes they just kind of raise their hackles and say how DARE you imply that I admit fault ever and you get retarded doublings down on being a dick that a simple sorry would fix
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apologies have a lot to do with maintaining social coherence and as noted are a really important ritual im not sure what the direction of causality is between their degradation and social disintegration but it seems salienthttps://twitter.com/Amos_5_18/status/1424992177650864128?s=19 …
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anyway I hope this helps its good practice to think about this as you go about your day on anon twitter and if your inappropriately rude to someone try saying sorry just to take a crack at it and then if theyre a dick about it, you know, just refuse, which is also good practice
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special thanks to the Church for really honing the matter of soteriology to a fine point and passing it to me in my younger days. im grateful for this and hope I have not misrepresented her terms too badly
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last thought in some ways this might make contemporary apologies a flex to the extent that it implies the person your apologizing to is not actually a threat to you not sure what i think of this.https://twitter.com/eigenrobot/status/1424992991760977923?s=19 …
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End of conversation
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Add in legal ramifications
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Lawyers while necessary almost always make everything worse
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Issue with making these mistakes is that it selects for individuals in one’s life who respond to making mistakes by never apologising or admitting wrong doing. ie if you are punitive in the face of contrition you will end up surrounded by people incapable of contrition.
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