a lot of social arguments appear to be difficulties in grappling with the fact that distributions have both averages and tails. there's probably a really good blog post to be written about this but i hope i'm not the one to write it bc hoo i don't want to be in that conversation
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before i post anything i think "do i want to engage in literally any sort of follow-up on this" and if the answer is no i do not post that thing
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