good thread from elle a long time ago i was in a really bad relationship that was both physically and emotionally abusive the physical abuse was basically risible to me and didnt even register. the other stuff messed me up a bit (im basically fine now) what i think is,https://twitter.com/ellegist/status/1402028775785779206 …
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theres not really any good way of handling bad actors and utility monsters in a trauma framework its a matter of imperfect information. if someone demands special treatment because they were traumatized another party basically has no way of knowing whether this is true
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and even if it is true, how "reasonable" in a sense that trauma is
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so theres a certain amount of consideration you have to give to the costs of accommodating any persons claimed trauma and also consideration of how likely it is that this trauma is genuine at all
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"all trauma is fake and dumb" is not true although i respect people who dont want to pay accommodation costs "believe all people claiming trauma and accommodate them maximally" is turning yourself into a doormat and enabling sociopaths
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generally i think we probably overaccommodate trauma now, vs probably underaccommodating it say thirty years ago iraq II may have been the turning point. a lot of people were coming back with diagnosed PTSD from eg seeing their friends killed or maimed by IEDs
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overall i blame tumblr. thank you for coming to my ted talk
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Replying to @eigenrobot
Isn't trauma in this context primarily retrospective? In this case physical trauma wouldn't be more objective because it's distinct from the pain experience (similar to how it's hard to say if 'fear' from a real encounter versus a film is realer, or something)
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yeah the subjective experience of ongoing trauma is just as murky but "my arm was blown off and it fucked me up a bit" is hard to fake I see your point though, what im saying isnt quite right
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Replying to @eigenrobot
Ah, no, I see now---the issue isn't objectivity per se but falsifiability. Well, I guess you also can't falsify it in the arm blown off case but I'm gonna let the one-armed guy have it, unless he's prime suspect in a murder case involving Harrison Ford
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