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eigenrobot's profile
eigenrobot
eigenrobot
eigenrobot
@eigenrobot

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eigenrobot

@eigenrobot

robot. friend.

eigenrobot.substack.com
Joined July 2013

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    1. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 11 Dec 2020

      oooh, the emperor just demoted the guy who advocated legalization its on

      1 reply 0 retweets 28 likes
      Show this thread
    2. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 11 Dec 2020

      jesus chinese drug czar gets pissed at the smugglers and decides to send a message by executing a chinese drug smuggler in front of the British quarter this sparks in a riot, british are besieged until rescued by chinese police

      2 replies 0 retweets 31 likes
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    3. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 11 Dec 2020

      the british and chinese governments are both against the drug trade the extremely rich anglo smugglers have a goodbye dinner for a guy who's retiring. the guy gives a speech about how the governments are the real smugglers, man

      1 reply 0 retweets 38 likes
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    4. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 12 Dec 2020

      chinese get fed up with intransigence and literally brick up the british in their housing british trade representative loses it decides to offer to BUY THE DRUGS from the smugglers and give them to the chinese its unclear whether he has the power to make this purchase

      1 reply 0 retweets 26 likes
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    5. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 12 Dec 2020

      turns out he does not have this authority uh oh

      1 reply 0 retweets 24 likes
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    6. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 12 Dec 2020

      queen victoria briefly becomes the largest opium owner in the world

      1 reply 2 retweets 44 likes
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    7. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 12 Dec 2020

      loooool the smugglers knew he didnt have authority to make the purchase but they signed it away anyway expecting to be able to sue the government into doing it anyway

      1 reply 1 retweet 24 likes
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    8. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 12 Dec 2020

      british trade rep has absolutely Cracked after exceeding his authority but basically resolving the crisis with the opium purchase, he writes an insane letter to the foreign office asking them to Destroy China

      4 replies 0 retweets 26 likes
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    9. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 12 Dec 2020

      british government gets the letter and sees how much the trade rep promised to pay for, apprently it is absolutely breathtaking they decide it would be cheaper to just go to war

      2 replies 0 retweets 40 likes
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    10. Gracchi Simp Account  🌐 🧦 🔰‏ @GracchiSimp 12 Dec 2020
      Replying to @eigenrobot

      I'm fucking dying with laughter rn

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 12 Dec 2020
      Replying to @GracchiSimp

      its the most british imperial decision imaginable

      1:48 AM - 12 Dec 2020
      • 1 Like
      • Gracchi Simp Account 🌐🧦🔰
      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like

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