"Can you please not be angry? It makes me feel unsafe." -> "Can you please not feel unsafe when I get angry at you? You are safe, I'm just angry."
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"Can you please not breastfeed your kid in public? It makes me feel really icky." -> "Can you please not feel icky when I'm breastfeeding my kid in public? I'm just breastfeeding, I'm not doing this to make you feel icky."
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"Can you please not misgender me? It makes me feel awful." -> "Can you please not feel awful when I gender you based on your sex at birth rather than your identified gender? That's just the framework I'm using, I'm not trying to hurt you here."
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1. you can't ask a person not to feel x emotion ("can you not be angry") 2. the correct answer to that is that it's your problem that you feel icky 3. the second case is a weird hypothetical and the first case is the right one
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Replying to @__justplaying
1. Technically correct, but in the broader sphere there are definitely many cases where we hold people responsible for their own emotions and thus license others not to take them into account. 2. Agree in this case, but that's not the point. 3. Disagree; it isn't hypothetical.
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re: 3, fine, but the second person still has no right to ask that in my book
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Replying to @__justplaying
Agree in this case, but that's still not my point! My point isn't that it's hard to figure out where we stand on each individual case, because everyone will have strong feelings on each of them; it's that we seem to lack a consistent rule for how to deal with this problem class.
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i get why you're frustrated i'm just saying there is no rule to be made here, it's inherently messy
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Replying to @__justplaying @Elodes12
*extremely
@eigenrobot voice* just be normal1 reply 0 retweets 4 likes -
"go to yuor room's until you calm down"
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Replying to @eigenrobot @Elodes12
i only have very inappropriate jokes for this, daddy,
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