I think "respect" is gesturing at something similar to what I'm getting at here In Washington's Social milueau--Social, not social--respect was probably an overriding concernhttps://twitter.com/eigenrobot/status/1308213248232009728?s=19 …
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In private settings, people may not need (on the margin) respect; you can probably take that for granted from your partner, for example (and if not there is a problem). You may instead need comfort, or reassurance, or simple attention
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A good set of exercises for socialing well is simply (i) spending time checking yourself when you speak with another and thinking about what you are looking for from a conversation; (ii) paying attention to what others seem to need from a given interaction;
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(iii) once you get good at (ii), be more deliberate about giving people what they're asking for. In the process you will probably get better at identifying what you are implicitly seeking in a given interaction, and going about finding it ways that make you more likely to get it
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Like just about anything else this trained perception can be used for good or bad ends. Con men and predators tend to be very good at pulling these levers in others (if not seeing themselves) That is no reason not to think about this.https://twitter.com/eigenrobot/status/1186476541124825089?s=19 …
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If you become good at seeing these needs: yes you could selfishly exploit them, but you could also inspire them to to do things they didnt know they could do, or guide them to bravery or kindness It might be easy to fool yourself about your motives, though, so first know thyself
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Meta note: I'm thinking that 90% of gitting good is simply paying attention to things I don't know how to teach paying attention to things except exhorting people to do it Seems important tho I have work more have a good evening and be nice to someonehttps://twitter.com/eigenrobot/status/1294683499962613762?s=19 …
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End of conversation
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Always conduct one's self ~*ᧁ𝘳ꪖᥴꫀᠻꪊꪶꪶꪗ*~
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Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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if you're being polite only because you have to, sure. but if you're being polite to genuinely put the other person at ease, i think that can convey warmth
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