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eigenrobot's profile
eigenrobot
eigenrobot
eigenrobot
@eigenrobot

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eigenrobot

@eigenrobot

robot. friend.

eigenrobot.substack.com
Joined July 2013

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    1. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 3 Sep 2020

      thread of Constitutional amendments to make America better than ever

      22 replies 13 retweets 115 likes
      Show this thread
    2. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 3 Sep 2020

      28. States are not eligible for representation in the electoral college unless there is a battleship named after the state in active service for three of the four years preceding the presidential election

      8 replies 3 retweets 115 likes
      Show this thread
    3. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 3 Sep 2020

      29. A sixth branch of government is established with the aim of assassinating members of the other five branches. It's still murder but only if they get caught and only if a plebiscite decides they actually liked whoever got merked, in retrospect.

      8 replies 5 retweets 119 likes
      Show this thread
    4. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 3 Sep 2020

      30. California and New York are dissolved as legal entities. Everyone in California has to live in brooklyn for twenty years and everyone from New York has to live in the Bay Area. Their elected officials be branded and banished to a ranch in Utah

      10 replies 6 retweets 107 likes
      Show this thread
    5. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 3 Sep 2020

      31. Interstate Commerce regulation is maintained at the Wickard v Filburn standard so government can still do anything it wants, but its restricted to only apply to interstate commerce in frank zappa albums so laws have to justify themselves on grounds of affecting that somehow

      7 replies 2 retweets 105 likes
      Show this thread
    6. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 3 Sep 2020

      32. Everything is a gun

      2 replies 2 retweets 94 likes
      Show this thread
    7. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 3 Sep 2020

      33. The Fed is abolished. We return to a gold standard. Specifically Au195

      5 replies 1 retweet 72 likes
      Show this thread
    8. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 4 Sep 2020

      34. Jurors shall now have the power to rule not only on the defendants guilt but on the guilt of witnesses, prosecutors, and especially the judge

      4 replies 5 retweets 89 likes
      Show this thread
    9. eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 8 Sep 2020

      eigenrobot Retweeted Orwell & Goode

      35.https://twitter.com/OrwellNGoode/status/1303347215491108871?s=19 …

      eigenrobot added,

      Orwell & Goode @OrwellNGoode
      Replying to @AJA_Cortes
      Income tax is bf%
      5 replies 0 retweets 34 likes
      Show this thread
    10. alice (taylor's version)‏ @__justplaying 8 Sep 2020
      Replying to @eigenrobot

      truly it costs nothing to not dunk on fat people

      1 reply 0 retweets 4 likes
      eigenrobot‏ @eigenrobot 8 Sep 2020
      Replying to @__justplaying

      i don't think that's what's happening here 🤔 gym %bf isnt about being fat or not, its about obsessing over a parameter for lifting, if that makes sense

      10:25 AM - 8 Sep 2020
      • 5 Likes
      • bosco Critter 🪡 🎄DJPNoel
      1 reply 0 retweets 5 likes
        1. New conversation
        2. moss‏ @owohundro 8 Sep 2020
          Replying to @eigenrobot @__justplaying

          >%bf isnt about being fat i don't have any interest in this particular horse race but i'd like to register my utter confusion here lest alice feels alone

          1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
        3. alice (taylor's version)‏ @__justplaying 8 Sep 2020
          Replying to @owohundro @eigenrobot

          yeah like i'm not overly familiar with gym culture but obsessing over body fat feels pretty much the same

          2 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        4. Show replies

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