Because I seem to enjoy waving lightning rods around in stormy weather, let me talk about verbal consent and kissing a little bit this morning. I was thinking about this after I read @eigenrobot’s thread about how he likes Brett Favre better than sex.
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Disclaimer right at the beginning: I have mixed feelings about this and also I am a hypocrite. I am personally neutral on people asking for verbal consent before they kiss me. I don’t mind it, but I don’t prefer it either. I think it’s actually a little better when they don’t.
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And when I kiss people, men and women (now primarily women), I only ask for consent beforehand if we’re in a scenario where I have reason to believe it might be awkward or difficult for them. Are they partnered or vibing awkward? Ask. Dance floor and leaned in? Go for it.
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I recently lost a friend over a group discussion about this. I mean, not JUST over this, but the tone of the conversation and the way my friends and I were reacting to his position severely damaged our relationship and the friendship hasn’t really recovered. This makes me sad.
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oh gosh is it someone I know
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