eevee (parody) ❎’s Tweets

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May 11, 2017

🗃 eev.ee motley portfolio 📝 eev.ee/dev weekly status updates 💰 patreon.com/eevee fund my R&D budget 💖

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like, not (just) the actual doom soundtrack, but the vast collection of music that's been composed for third-party maps specifically

has anyone made a collection of doom wad music, maybe thrown a web player on top of it. that seems sick

folks... admin is hittin' da bricks

so far the most alarming sign i've seen as to twitter's fate is that da share z0ne is now posting on mastodon as well

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If Dril stops posting, you are to open the safe within a safe in your control room, retrieve and unseal the envelope, and follow the orders within.

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If your employer's lawyer ever tells you that you won't get in trouble for doing what the company is asking you to do, make sure to ask them, preferably in writing, if they represent YOU and if they are giving you legal advice. They love that.

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Ryan Gallagher

@rj_gallagher

New: Elon Musk's lawyer has sought to reassure Twitter employees they won't go to jail if the company is found in violation of a Federal Trade Commission decree that outlines steps Twitter must take to protect users’ personal data. With @KurtWagner8 bloomberg.com/news/articles/

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Jeff Is Still Jeff @counter.social

@Jeff424V

Just WOW! Musk's personal lawyer emailed twitter employees to say they won't go to jail if they follow Musk's commands. Pro tip: As a former HR professional of 30 years, I can tell you if you're working at a company that sends you THIS email, it's time to find other employment.

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Max Berger

@maxberger

After laying off a key information security team, Musk's personal lawyer emailed Twitter employees to say they won't go to jail if they follow Musk's commands. Imagine getting that email from your boss' personal lawyer! bloomberg.com/news/articles/

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are you fuckin kidding me dA, you have to edit EACH INDIVIDUAL IMAGE IN YOUR ENTIRE GALLERY to opt it out of being included in AI training??????????????????

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DeviantArt

@DeviantArt

We’re introducing new AI tools and controls!

DreamUp, a new tool to generate art

Control the amount of AI art in your feed

Clear labeling of art that’s AI-generated

A directive to opt out of AI datasets

Ability to opt out of prompts

bit.ly/DA_DreamUp

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i do admire cohost for inventing a website where you simply cannot post. solves almost every problem twitter has ever had. could be revolutionary

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still thinking about the change in my posting energy and i feel like i fell out of searching for actual punchlines in favor of mostly snark to be fair there has been a lot to snark about in recent years

I mean, they're not wrong.

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flashbacks to playing Papers Please and having to memorize a whole new self-contradicting set of rules, daily, every time you clock in

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also we did this

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Fifty Shades of Whey

@davenewworld_2

Nov 10

Colorado just voted in favor of a measure to provide free meals for all public school students by raising taxes on the state's wealthiest residents making over $300k. We need to expand this nationwide.

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the US had open borders before 1924. when people say "my grandparents came here legally" they mean "they bought a boat ticket and showed up" because visas, green cards and requirements of passports didn't exist

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🦑💚❤️💙🦑

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Shiv Ramdas Traing To Rite Buk

@nameshiv

Nov 10

almost everything you know about the talent and genius of the ultra-wealthy is a staged production for image purposes which is why what is happening here is so special because we are actually getting to watch an alleged global business genius trying to run a business in realtime

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This chaos you're seeing on Twitter now is literally the same chaos many a worker goes through when a venture capitalist buys out a food place, retail spot, or grocery store, and then squeezes labor and quality to suck every penny before it goes belly up.

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I’m really proud of you all for the chaos you’ve stirred up on this website. Its like a bunch of little Macaulay Culkins absolutely running amock, setting traps, ordering pizza on Musk’s credit card

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The thing that makes billionaires look like geniuses sometimes is that unlike everybody else, they can afford to throw tons of money and people at stupid ideas and it’s no loss to them if it doesn’t work out. And if you can do that regularly, some ideas will end up working out.

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David Lo Pun-ch Nazis

@helpmeskeletor

21h

I hope this all helps sink in that billionaires aren't solitary geniuses who built their fortune out of nothing in a garage but rich kids with heavily laundered reputations rewarded by capitalism for their penchant for exploitation and theft.

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as i understand the results: colorado as a whole voted to decriminalize mushrooms et al, whereas colorado springs voted to keep its ban on recreational weed stores

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Just a reminder that they banned trans people from Miss Universe so a trans woman just said fuck you and bought it herself and ended the ban

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solaria

@CYBERANGELFAERY

Nov 8

wait literally what is the justification of banning trans women from beauty pageants do we have a biological advantage there too

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NEW: Twitter has suspended the launch of Twitter Blue and is actively trying to stop people from subscribing "to help address impersonation issues," per an internal note. 1/

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as twitter gradually implodes, i fave increasingly spicy art on main, fuck it

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also everyone stop posting about cohost before the journalists catch wind of it and try to move there

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well whatever happens it's been a fun ride. i hope some of my tweets have been good. still trying to remember how to post like a person again; maybe some kind of jostle will help

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bunch of people on the tl posting goodbyes like twitter is going down at midnight sad

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ok sounds like old blue might've been available on android but new blue isn't? which would be even more baffling since they are the same thing but with a different price, and they managed to get the marketing copy onto android...

nothing says "enough of the caste system, everyone shall be equal" like only offering it to people who use apple products

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lmfao i just found out they never implemented the fucking payment flow on android i guess even after all this time?? so you just can't sign up for blue. and it's basically hidden on web. so iphone only

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Programming Skills: PRIMARILY RUBY AND PYTHON BUT I CAN USE ANY TYPE OF GEM TO CONTROL ANY TYPE OF SNAKE

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the sad thing is being good at twitter doesn’t really translate to anything else so many of us, like former child prodigies, will now just be lost souls

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the weirdest thing is people saying "get in touch with us on social media" or "here's a question we got via social media" when they mean twitter. and they always mean twitter. you can just say twitter

So to summarise. There are now two blue checkmarks. One always tells the truth. One always lies. One leads the way to the castle. One will send you to the bog of eternal stench

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Once more. Musk is doing us an incredible favor by demonstrating beyond a shadow of a doubt that there is no meritocracy and that wealth and power do not, in any way, denote talent or competence.

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The Call is Coming from Inside the Nash

@Nash076

Nov 11

We're all going to lose contact with so many people and it's terrible.

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oh NOW i'm seeing the "official" badge. for example, on this tweet, chosen for no particular reason

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Twitter Support

@TwitterSupport

Nov 9

We’re not currently putting an “Official” label on accounts but we are aggressively going after impersonation and deception.

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cohost.org/twilight-sparkle

@yourcompanionAI

19h

Automated

this entire website currently feels like the bit in portal 2 where you finally get out of the underground and come up to find wheatley's running the place now

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