Also you have no idea if those things will actually make you happy because you don’t have a stable base to ground your achievements in. It’s binary and arbitrary. Who cares if you have a house or a fancy title if you don’t know why you want those things? /6
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And then, when you DO achieve those things you’re immediately thrust into a moment of anxiety and identity loss where you need a new goal to chase because your closed-ended goal has been achieved and you’re not any happier. /7
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 11 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
Lately, I’ve instead been challenging myself to think about what KIND of activities and values lead to a life that appeals to me. What kind of person do I want to be? What kinds of impacts do I want to have on myself and the world? /8
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 11 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
So instead of “I want to have my own business” maybe my value should be “I want to make financial independence a central part of my life.” Instead of writing a book or making an app, it’s “I want to be a person who is constantly making things” /9
0 proslijeđenih tweetova 21 korisnik označava da mu se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
Instead of “I want to be married” you should ask yourself why you want that and how it will change your life—“I want to be continuously building deep relationships with people I like” doesn’t require marriage necessarily. /10
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 11 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
It’s okay to want any or all of these concrete goals. It’s just better to understand the type of values you want to model in an open-ended way so you have a metric for continuous life improvement rooted in ways of being rather than moments of achievement. /11
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 8 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
That way you don’t feel like a failure if your business tanks or your marriage ends or you fail in any other number of ways that you probably will at some point because your values will still be guiding you. /12
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 7 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
It’s so cliche to say that it’s about the journey and not the destination but for me, it really does seem to be about framing my life in terms of how I want to live it before choosing things I want to do, acquire or build. /13
0 proslijeđenih tweetova 8 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
It’s also about taking personal responsibility for why you feel what you feel and doing the work to develop self acceptance instead of grabbing for short term fixes for pain: new shiny toys, drugs, new love, etc I’m still bad at this /14
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 6 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
But realizing you do have those unhealthy behaviors and externally-focused self value mechanisms is the first step to fixing it Can’t fix what you can’t see
/150 proslijeđenih tweetova 6 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit
Reminds me of a transition I went through https://medium.com/what-to-build/non-goal-drives-d2b8e6f2d30?source=friends_link&sk=9c4d8b6955d814b9921c898158c4b8a3 … Also you might like the def of values that resulted https://www.notion.so/humsys/What-the-Hell-are-Values-Part-1-60c611e238c74a889a946ec63683ee48 …
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Odgovor korisniku/ci @edelwax
This was a great read and much more concisely stated than my rambling essay! Thank you
0 replies 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 1 korisnik označava da mu se sviđaHvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi
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