Evan Urquhart

It's very insidious. She doesn't say how they should behave, just repeats over and over how much they like pink, how feminine they are, etc.

My niece likes pink, don't get me wrong. Also loves looking in the dirt for bugs and grasshoppers! She's a mix, like most kids.

What about sibs? I'm sandwiched between two brothers & wore lots of unisex clothing. Anything expensive, like winter coats, had to be navy.

My sister and I are two years apart- she's very traditionally feminine so wasn't harmed as much by the expectation that she be so.

She's straight, I guess? I know so many queer femmes who had to reclaim femininity, to reject their socialization & own it for themselves.

Oh yes! (I have even written something on this: http://www.slate.com/blogs/outward/2015/03/12/femme_lesbians_shouldn_t_be_defined_by_their_butches.html …)

Were you stigmatized for resisting? I kinda question the received idea that "we all" think tomboys are cute but girly boys are more suspect.

I was almost completely friendless, but there were tomboys who were popular. They were good at sports- made all the difference.