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She meant that when she sees black students at the bottom of the class, it makes her feel guilty because it reminds her of her own racism. But also, she meant, she shouldn't have to feel guilty, because everyone knows black people are intellectually inferior.
But of course, when a commenter asks me "you know what she meant" they mean "Come on Evan. You're white. Deep down you know black people are intellectually inferior." And, no. I know, deep down, that a black student couldn't get a fair shake from that teacher.
I know, deep down, that these attitudes are everywhere, and all black students are hurt by them. I know it all the more when another white person tries to give me a knowing nod or lock eyes with me in a knowing way.
SO, yes, I fucking know exactly what she meant. I know what you mean, too, when you ask me that. Get the fuck out of here.
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