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e_urq's profile
Evan Urquhart
Evan Urquhart
Evan Urquhart
@e_urq

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Evan Urquhart

@e_urq

He/Him. Trans Journo. Views expressed are representative of that Dunkin Donuts I worked in one summer.

Joined March 2009

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    1. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7

      I'd say that feeling like a man is sufficient, but not necessary, for being a man. So: Everyone who consistently feels like a man is a man. Some people who don't feel like men are also men. Let's focus on this second group. Why are they men?

      1 reply 1 retweet 21 likes
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    2. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7

      Way back when I was just coming to awareness that I was trans, I really struggled with this question of "Could I say I'm a man and would that be ridiculous or a lie?"

      1 reply 0 retweets 16 likes
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    3. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7

      A very wise trans woman told me about a friend of hers who believed transition was a matter of persuasion. If you persuaded the majority of people in your social millieu to accept you as a gender, you became that gender.

      1 reply 0 retweets 18 likes
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    4. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7

      I found this very comforting at the time. I don't think it's quite my final answer to "WHAT AM MAN???" but I like locating gender in social relationships as an alternative to people's inner feelings and thoughts.

      1 reply 0 retweets 19 likes
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    5. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7

      My gender dysphoria is based on physical attrubutes, not social role. There's nothing about a natal male body I wouldn't want, and nothing about a natal female body I'd like to keep.

      1 reply 0 retweets 20 likes
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    6. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7

      I pursued/am pursuing a binary gender transition. When people gender me male that is comfortable- no part of myself cries out "that's wrong!" So, when I say "I am a man" I mostly mean that when people see me as a man, that's the most comfortable situation for me.

      2 replies 0 retweets 29 likes
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    7. Sandbot‏ @Sandbot2 Feb 7
      Replying to @e_urq

      could you elaborate on what you mean by "my gender dysphoria is based on physical attrubutes" + "when people see me as a man, that's ... most comfortable"? b/c feeling uncomfortable when ppl fail to perceive you as a man just is "social dysphoria" (as i understand the term)

      2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
    8. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7
      Replying to @Sandbot2

      Yeah, I'll gladly say more about that. Before I experienced physical changes I actually felt LESS comfortable when people used he/him pronouns for me in queer spaces.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
    9. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7
      Replying to @e_urq @Sandbot2

      My body hadn't changed, so the use of male pronouns felt awkwardly premature. I preferred female pronouns while my body was still female-coded. Now when I'm gendered male by strangers, it reinforces how my body changed, which feels good. Absent those changes it did not.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
    10. Sandbot‏ @Sandbot2 Feb 7
      Replying to @e_urq

      huh, that's interesting so would transition be completely unappealing/incomprehensible to you if medical technology didn't enable the alteration of sex characteristics?

      1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7
      Replying to @Sandbot2

      Yes- even in a completely affirming environment I'd have no interest in social transition without medical transition. In a totally unaffirming situation I'd want medical transition just as much even if name/pronoun and other social changes were off limits somehow.

      9:44 AM - 7 Feb 2021
      • 1 Like
      • Sandbot
      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
        1. New conversation
        2. Sandbot‏ @Sandbot2 Feb 7
          Replying to @e_urq

          if, pre-transition, you could have taken a magic pill to eliminate all physical dysphoria (no side effects), would you have preferred that to transitioning? and, if so, is that a 'duh, obviously' kind of decision?

          1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
        3. Evan Urquhart‏ @e_urq Feb 7
          Replying to @Sandbot2

          Its a duh, obviously- I'd have no interest in that kind of 'cure' now, since my body has changed, but pre-transition I'd have gladly taken a 'cure' to make me a cis woman over a medical transition if such a thing was available to me.

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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