I've had a lot of success in helping people who were once trans-skeptical to become supporters of trans rights, and I'd like to share my process in case it helps.https://twitter.com/Chican3ry/status/1355875428834140163 …
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My day job is moderating online comments, so it's no accident that I know tricks to online communication others don't. This is my bread and butter.
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The most important thing to keep in mind is: A committed transphobe's mind is not open to changing, certainly not in one conversation. But, you CAN change the mind of people watching your exchange with a transphobe who start out more sympathetic to their side than yours.
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Sometimes you can talk directly to a mildly transphobic person about their questions and concerns, but often they're staying quiet, watching and forming judgements based on what they see. My primary goal is to appeal to this secondary audience at all times.
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What might a mildly transphobic but open minded person see? They'll see a top level post, some replies, and maybe one or at most two replies to those replies. They're not going to read an argument ten or twenty replies deep.
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Based on that, I try to avoid more than 2 or 3 replies. My primary audience has gotten bored. If I haven't moved their opinion yet, more replies won't help.
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What else do we know about mild transphobes with open minds. We know they're turned off by name-calling and personal attacks. So, don't use those. They like respectability politics, so if you feel comfortable deploying that sort of rhetoric it may help. What else?
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Mildly transphobic but open minded people tend to think that transphobia is common sense and supported by basic science, and that trans people are wildly emotional, likely mentally ill, and don't have any answers to questions transphobes pose.
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A trans person answering simply, politely, with confidence and clear evidence has an outsized positive impact compared to how easy it is to do.
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An ideal exchange with a transphobe online, therefore, will have these elements: It is no more than 3 replies long. It employs simple language and defines terms. It relies on clear evidence that anyone can follow. All insults are from the transphobe towards the trans person.
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One final thing I do- sometimes using my third or fourth reply after my point has been made, is to politely state why I'm leaving the conversation there. This is a sign to my audience that I wasn't gobsmacked by the last reply/bad faith question/attack, I chose to disengage.
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"I'm sorry, I can't engage with you if you're going to make personal attacks." "I'm sorry, I discuss the totality of the scientific evidence, I can't engage if you're going to cherry pick studies." Even, in a pinch, "It's getting late here but thanks for the interesting chat."
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People often say arguing with transphobes is useless because you can't change their minds. The second part is true, but that doesn't make it useless. If you know who your real audience is, you can help change people's minds. I've seen it happen many times!
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End of conversation
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