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Unisex public bathrooms have taught me a lot about culture. They're a great example of my own cultural conditioning being so strong that I had trouble believing it was cultural conditioning and not reality based. https://twitter.com/mosquito_chaser/status/1296264147454197760 …
I grew up with sex segregated bathrooms, and deeply internalized the idea that sex segregated bathrooms were safe. So, the first time I used a multi-stall, multi-sex bathroom (at Grendel's Den in Harvard Sq), I felt frightened.
I was on a date with @mosquito_chaser at the time, years before my transition.
Seeing a man in the restroom felt wrong. I couldn't believe Cassie didn't feel frightened like I did. I didn't get how everyone there just going about their lives, and nothing bad was happening.
Grendel's Den is a thriving restaurant in an obscenely wealthy and privileged part of the country which has been operating since the 1970s. It *felt* dangerous because of my cultural conditioning. There was no real danger there. If there was, there wouldn't be a Grendel's Den.
Mind you, just knowing that unisex bathrooms aren't dangerous didn't change how I felt. When I transitioned I struggled with conquering my fear of entering men's restrooms.
Nothing bad ever happened to me in a men's restroom, but it took months for me to work up the courage to use them exclusively. The slightest questioning look (before I was passing 100%) would send me back to the women's room for weeks.
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