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And the only reason I would contest this is that if we truly did live in a world free from these constraints, where would we get the idea that how we present ourselves is somehow tied to our biology?
Perhaps I wasn't clear enough- it was never about how I presented myself. The discomfort was w/ my body feeling and looking wrong. Certain clothing camouflaged that to an extent. Nothing to do w/ presentation or social role.
If dresses had somehow resulted in my looking like I had the body of a natal man, I'd have worn dresses! And- this wasn't about passing, either (I never once passed pre-hrt). It was solely how my body looked to me in the mirror.
I feel that. I still have that discomfort. But I think I approached it more so as I approached my eating disorder. In my brain, my body looks ‘wrong’ for a multitude of reasons. I just simply don’t think that’s a state of being one arrives at without societal influence.
Eating disorders are terrible- my sympathy if you're still dealing with that. I was 100% symptom free for many years before my transition. There was definitely a question in my mind of whether my feelings about my body were permanent and related to my ED history.
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