Bathroom bills are a huge opportunity for trans men to engage in loud, insistent, obnoxious civil obedience. Remember, you can follow the rules and still pee standing up, with the door open, then wash your packer out in the sink of the ladies' room.
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Overtly reinforcing beliefs that cis women can’t feel safe in bathrooms with trans people caters straight to the precise fears you’re trying to overcome. The presence or absence of penises in the women’s bathroom is an issue the other side *wants* to litigate on.
The other side wants passing trans men to quietly break their law so it can be enforced selectively against trans women. Shining a light on the unintended consequences of a bad law won't play into their hands. It will embarrass them.
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It will cause a change in legal phrasing around the presence of particular genitalia. Emphasizing differences rarely wins culture wars; emphasize the ways we are the same. Gay marriage won because straight people decided gay couples were like them & should be treated as such.
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This is going to have to be one of those agree to disagree moments. You can't avoid all conflict and hope the good people will see you're right. You have to highlight the absurdity and injustice you're faced with in ways that grab attention and make people uncomfortable.
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