My convo with Steensma was quite interesting. I remember he pushed back a little on my naming the other approach "affirming" because he didn't want to be presented in opposition to those who affirm, and we did a bit of "what does affirming really mean" back and forth.https://twitter.com/e_urq/status/1194019833634885634 …
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Only one quote from Steensma made it into my piece. He said: “With extreme gender nonconformity, the chances of a non-normative development path is very high. Most will have a non-normative gender presentation in adulthood, and/or identify as gay, trans, etc...
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(cont) Parents need to ask: What is the best decision to make now, that will benefit the child now, but won’t confuse them or make things more difficult later?”
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Steensma talked a lot about cultural differences, and said an approach that worked in San Francisco might not work as well elsewhere. At one point he seemed to me to be hinting that, for some children, seeming to desist might be better than facing abuse at home or school.
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That last thing (which to reiterate was a feeling I got, not his actual words) is coming back to me now, as a parent of foster youth. Some children ARE better off desisting than facing abuse or entering the system... but to me that just adds urgency to social change.
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Culture isn't static. It can change so fewer kids are in situations where their best bet is to hide who they are until they can escape. That's why researchers need to unite & tell the truth about what research shows which is: Trans youth do better when they are affirmed.
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