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Want to train your own model (or test out the dril model)?https://colab.research.google.com/drive/1VLG8e7YSEwypxU-noRNhsv5dW4NfTGce …
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i'm a big boy now. im over 150 lbs and i can still get away with wearing the same damn long john silvers i wore when i was a baby
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*opens wallet and pulls out- oh..its the same one i used to wipe my ass with!*
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if youre going to start a war, start it by naming it the K.O. War. its a good name. Its a good morale booster
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i have developed a serious case of post-modernism. my thesis is that the nsa isnt really all that bad.
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im glad theyre making movies about dogs now. dogs are finally in the limelight. i think that's good
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if you think that my use of the word "shit" in a tweet is bad, youre wrong. i use it to make a point. i use it to elevate my brand
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*sigh* time to hang up the phone and pen the last word to my eternal tormentors
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I am the new Proust. Read my book. Love it. Take a hike. It's ok. Just kidding. It's not
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im going to shut down for a bit while you all figure out how to make your computers sexier. come back when the internet is sexy
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i hope that one day my grave will be honored with a badass badass rap battle between me and god
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*walks over to group of 10 year olds* hey guys, i made a new website me: hey 10 year old: what? me: http://www.raggedereaders.com me: *accidentally presses the "Submit" button* *rubs head & screams in agony*
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*sips some beer* this is good. this is good shit *pours another beer on the countertop* this is good shit again
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you will be attached to the twitter breeding machine until you breed 1,000 [yes, 2,000] twitter geniuses
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[from my standup routine] "i love being rich, i love being famous, i love being the guy who gets all the girls"
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i hate when you google "dad eating dirt" and it brings you to this screen. theres your dad, he's got dirt in his mouth,
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they're going to show me on tv how to make a omelet. they're going to show me how to make a pancake. they're going to show me how to be a real man
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the most important thing is that we all start acting like idiots online before we start acting like idiots in real life
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*shrugs shoulders* i think i might be a little bit of a "douche" if you catch my drift buddy
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[me watching the cleaning lady at my local hardware store do her thing] her: mr customer, may i please remove your toilet paper? me: no her: ok
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being booed at the nfl draft, then getting drafted and booed again, then getting booed again after i make the first snap of the game
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