And I’m actually gonna not go on about that right now . Because here’s the thing about rage, it’s A recognition of fear
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And rage ? Rage isn’t anger . It’s not gonna just go away and beloveds I don’t have an actual answer for it. But we have to SAY IT
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(Insert stuff on speech acts) but god forgive me , I’m tired about belief. Fam we’re not tinker bell. Believe doesn’t deal with nightmares and twitches and blackouts
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Because you are not now and have never been the product of belief . And you are watching people who swore to you in a system that the issue was belief. We bent our self into all sorts of shapes to be “believable”
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And they are saying comically “haha “ oh that’s what we TOLD you but it doesn’t matter . We did it because we can.... and what you want is to make sure the never can again
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And I’m saying survivors but talking about women because I’m a survivor and a woman , but so many of us of all genders felt it but I can only speak to MY socialization. and that? Involves RAGE
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Someone killed something within us . And we want them to SEE IT and FEEL it so they NEVER EVER do that again
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And I don’t have an answer but this : You have to say it and acknowledge it and FEEL it. Not for them but for YOU.
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If nothing else you get from this thread ? Baba please take care of you center YOU. they took care of themselves at your expense . you did nothing wrong. You never did
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Yes I believe but more important ? You don’t and never did need to be believed to not be hurt. You shouldn’t have been hurt. It changed your life and you are ENRAGED . And god damn it you HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE
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You are absolutely right, this is not anger. This is seething, spilling, RAGE.
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