Divia Eden

@diviacaroline

Rationalist, unschooler, clicker training enthusiast, Dorothy Dunnett lover, married to . Hanging out with my kids and trying to figure stuff out.

San Francisco
Vrijeme pridruživanja: siječanj 2009.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    20. pro 2019.

    Now that I’ve wrapped up this thread, it seems like a good time to extend a general invitation to my noncoercive parenting slack channel. Join if you want!

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  2. prije 18 sati

    And getting the other person to anchor on their BATNA. Track your BATNA, and remember it’s costly to keep it at the top of your mind.

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  3. prije 18 sati

    A problem with “boundaries” is anchoring on your BATNA.

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  4. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    Most people do incl me. It's considered the norm that you have years and years of dating and a trail of breakups, exes, apartments, moves, upsets. And people call those things "growth", when in another light, they're the opposite, they're a decade of things that stunted growth.

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  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    19. kol 2018.
    Odgovor korisniku/ci

    People often forget how important the mechanisms by which this money gets into the system are.

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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    31. sij

    Longer conversations aren't more helpful. Once you build rapport, explore the issue, know what they're looking for, collaboratively search for solutions together, and make a plan, stop! Rumination and repetitive circling around are easy patterns to fall into.

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    31. sij
    Odgovor korisnicima

    Made this for you.

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  8. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    31. sij

    it is a mystery to me how politicians can repeat the same stump speech hundreds and hundreds of times, i can barely tell the same story to 3 different friends w/o getting a little self conscious

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  9. 31. sij

    If the habit doesn’t click, debug it instead of trying to repeat it a bunch of times. If it’s tiny enough and you are celebrating right, it shouldn’t take long.

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  10. 31. sij

    Thread on Tiny Habits: The main ideas according to me: -peg habits to very specific times (after I turn the water off > after I wash my hands -make them v tiny (e.g. floss one tooth) and let them grow -celebrate it (like “yes” and a fist pump, not like eating ice cream)

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  11. 31. sij

    Me: What are the odds we do x? : I don’t know! And then I hear him mutter “that’s what odds are for...” under his breath.

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  12. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    It's 4 days before Iowa. If you're planning to say after the someone wraps up the nomination in a few months that it was *obvious all along* how the Dem primary was going to unfold, please use this thread to state your prediction on who wins and their rough path to victory.

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    30. sij

    Two journalists block your path to epistemically sound knowledge of current event. One tells only lies. The other tells only truths that are designed to mislead you.

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  14. 30. sij
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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    30. sij

    in which a bill that would have absolutely provided more affordable housing is struck down because it "did not provide enough affordable housing," the lie anti-housing activists most love to scream at us while they burn our state to the ground

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  16. 30. sij

    Yes but pretty sure you really do need the active recall piece so I dunno.

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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I love telling my single friends they don't need a man and then coming home to my boyfriend and begging him to do everything for me

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  18. 30. sij

    Here’s an example from the appendix where a customer has a laptop with a broken screen that isn’t covered by the warrantee. The stuff it says to say does seem much better than just saying that the damage isn’t covered!

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  19. 30. sij

    Yeah basically anytime I am saying not to someone I’ve been consulting the scripts from this book and it does seem better. Hmm, also seems like potentially good strategy for my internal dialogue actually so I want to pay attention to that part as well.

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  20. 30. sij

    I also had a fun time unpacking what seemed like the implicit philosophy underlying the advice—also good stuff about how people can go really haywire without: -descriptions of their state and -plans for achieving their values that make sense to -themselves and -others

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  21. 30. sij

    I think I’ve seen a subtle but good difference in how I’ve been with my kids in the last week or so since I read it.

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