Danny Vega

@dannyvegacomedy

comedian // good, hungry boy

New York, NY
favstar.fm/users/dannyveg…
Joined September 2011
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  1. Pinned Tweet
    May 31

    Remember when Infowars was a fun website to check when high, like "Lol ppl think clouds are murdering us."

    1 reply 5 retweets 13 likes
  2. 35 minutes ago

    Hi, nice to meet you. My name's Danny Vega and I have some skin conditions I'd like to tell you about.

    1 like
  3. 36 minutes ago

    Comic giving health advice: Haven't you heard my bit about acupuncture? Just see an acupuncturist. It works

    1 like
  4. Retweeted
    May 30

    Everytime you close your eyes you are culturally appropriating blind people.

    6 retweets 29 likes
  5. 20 hours ago

    Hey guys Squish Marshmellows hired me to be their lead designer. Hire me! Packages start at $11,000 for a drawing that takes me 4 seconds

    1 retweet 7 likes
  6. Retweeted
    Jun 7

    The Babadook fought so we could live 🏳️‍🌈 (h/t )

    8 replies 1,703 retweets 4,753 likes
  7. Retweeted
    Jun 7

    We all agree the Babadook is queer, but are they dom or sub or switch?

    3 replies 11 retweets 32 likes
  8. Jun 6

    Fact: Rich people used to think poor people all had diseases because of poverty. And they still think that in America because it's true

    5 likes
  9. Retweeted
    Jun 6

    I just went to the gym. I definitely feel less stressed out. The problem is I can't feel my feet and my tail is missing.

    1 reply 10 retweets 22 likes
  10. Jun 5

    my gf wore my Arizona State shirt as pajamas and now she has an honorary degree and a frat named after her

    21 likes
  11. Retweeted
    Jun 5

    If you smoke American Spirits during pregnancy your kid comes out libtarded

    1 reply 5 retweets 44 likes
  12. Jun 5

    There's never been an attack of 4,000 tiny, carnivorous horses at a Nascar race. Nascar fans are all armed. Draw your own conclusions.

    There's never been a terrorist attack at a Nascar race. Nascar fans are all armed. Draw your own conclusions
    8 likes
  13. Jun 5

    There's never been a terrorist attack at a goat farm. People in a goat's farm are all goat herders. Draw your own conclusions.

    There's never been a terrorist attack at a Nascar race. Nascar fans are all armed. Draw your own conclusions
    1 retweet 21 likes
  14. Retweeted
    Jun 3

    happy pride month from queer icon the babadook

    337 replies 28,255 retweets 66,042 likes
  15. Retweeted
    Jun 3

    I'd also think Islam is at war, if I ignored ISIS killing 80 in Kabul and killing more Muslims than anyone.

    1 reply 2 retweets 8 likes
  16. Jun 3

    Hey if any ladies got this at their crib, I'm single

    13 likes
  17. Jun 3

    I don't care what the maître d' says, my seeing-eye horse doesn't leave my side

    10 likes
  18. Jun 3

    If you voted Trump, you're not allowed to enjoy Despacito

    7 likes
  19. Retweeted
    Jun 3

    I got an idea for Bill Maher that'll make everybody happy: he still gets to host Real Time, but all of his guests are malnourished wolves.

    10 replies 223 retweets 1,227 likes
  20. Jun 3

    My gf just asked me if Jerry Seinfeld does stand up. How's the dating market for a good, balding boy?

    9 likes
  21. Jun 3

    The dinosaurs were on earth 100s of millions of years, or just a bit longer than my girlfriend takes to get ready

    3 replies 2 retweets 17 likes

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