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Yeah, my kid is only 9+ months, so the learning is just beginning. My general heuristic is to be as honest as possible, to tell hard truths, but gently, showing the upside. Let's see how well it works out...
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I'd like to hear the perspectives of
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I like your approach there, Jason. I also like what Gibran says about parenting & children in "The Prophet." They aren't "ours." They aren't "for" us. They do not "belong" to us. We do not "own" them. But we are responsible "to" them & their unique unfolding.
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Aw man, I wish this was a more prevalent belief in our society. Seriously wishing for a children's rights movement to follow the women, racial minorities and LGBT community.
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I'm literally tearing up thinking about this. Our society is sick because we habitually and institutionally abuse our children. This needs to change.
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What is the first step? Healing and deinstitutionalising is a slow process, and fraught if we aren't certain of our own abilities. I don't have children and don't expect to for a while. What to do in the meantime?
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I wish I knew. I also don't (and most likely won't, for a long time if ever) have children. In the interim I've been recommending Ivan Illich "Deschooling Society" to everyone who I think will bother to read the thing. http://learning.media.mit.edu/courses/mas713/readings/DESCHOOLING.pdf …
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Could you possibly summarize it in a tweet length?
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Weirdly, having a kid has mostly given me perspective on stuff my parents did. Seeing it play out in my own behavior is pretty eerie at times. Also had to seriously reconsider a lot of personal traits under those circumstances.
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> Seeing it play out in my own behavior is pretty eerie at times. my mother talks about this a lot. she calls it "the tape recorder burned into my mind", filled with recordings of her mother, and her grandmother that come out of her own mouth. I just call it Karma.
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I like your mother's phrase better. It's very accurate, and quite poetic.
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If you catch yourself doing it, it does sound like a recordinh. Super creepy, and quite humbling.
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