Don’t touch your eyes Just hand sanitize quicklyyyyy I’m just a poor boy, no job security Because of easy spread, even though washed your hands, laying low I look out the window, the curve doesn’t look flatter to me, to me
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I've lost my mind. I wrote Coronavirus Rhapsody: Is this a sore throat? Is this just allergies? Caught in a lockdown No escape from reality.
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mama, just killed a man i didn’t stay inside in bed I walked by him, now he’s dead mama, life was so much fun but now I’ve caught this unforgiving plague
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mama, oooooh didn’t mean to make them die if I’m not back to work this time tomorrow carry on, carry on as if people didn’t matter
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oo late, my time has come sends shivers down my spine body’s aching all the time goodbye everybody, I’ve got the flu gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
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mama, oooooh I don’t wanna die I sometimes wish I never went out at all
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I see a little silhouette of a man what a douche, what a douche did he even wash his hands though security is tightening very very frightening me Gotta lay low (gotta lay low) Gotta lay low (gotta lay low) Gotta lay low masturbate Masturbate O O O O
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I’m just a poor boy, facing mortality HE’S JUST A POOR BOY FACING MORTALITY spare him his life from this monstrosity
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Touch your face, wash your hands, will you wash your hands? BISMILLAH NO WE WILL NOT WASH OUR HANDS! (WASH YOUR HANDS!) BISMILLAH NO WE WILL NOT WASH OUR HANDS! (WASH YOUR HANDS)
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BISMILLAH WE WILL NOT WASH YOUR HANDS! (WASH YOUR HANDS!) WASH YOUR HANDS! (never, never, never wash your hands oh oh oh oh oh oh oh) No no no no no Oh mama mia, mia (mama mia wash your hands!) COVID-19 has a sickness put aside for me, for me
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So you think you can stop me and just shake my hand? So you think we can hang out and not break our plans? Oh baby, can’t do this with me, baby, Just gotta stay home, just gotta stay home with my fever
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oooooh Curving can get flatter Anyone can see Curving can get flatter Curving can get flatter, you’ll see Just look out your windows…. FLATTEN THE CURVE
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My dream is to give back to the people around me, to take care of the people in my community. I want to lift up the vulnerable. If you take anything from this parody, take care of each other. I hope to be able to use this virality to help my friends. Let's do that. DJB
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It would mean a lot to me if you donated to this
@gofundme My wonderful and hilarious friend@crankyface is kicking cancer's ass and I'd love to help her. Link here:https://www.gofundme.com/f/shannon-fights-cancer …Show this thread -
It would mean a lot to me if you donated to my coworkers at
@inmanoasis who are out of work during the pandemic. You can send money to their@venmo account: @inmanoasistipsShow this thread -
It would mean a lot to me if you helped my friends at
@TheComedyStudio by donating to the@gofundme set up by@birbigs &@GaryGulman Here's the link:https://www.gofundme.com/f/tip-your-waitstaff-the-comedy-studio?fbclid=IwAR2eNIcLzT7xR2tSlyUm4gVRoUpDnQZbQ4mz-lM9hjUH8YR6I8vQe5DK4qc …Show this thread -
It would mean a lot to me if you helped out my beautiful friends at
@1369coffeehouse by donating to their staff fund to help them recover their lost wages. Here's their@gofundme :https://www.gofundme.com/f/provide-relief-for-service-workers-during-covid …Show this thread -
It would mean a lot to me if you considered supporting the comedy theater that made me the comedian I am. Please consider donating to
@improvboston - they're a wonderful non-profit comedy theater. I wouldn't be me without them.https://improvboston.com/portfolio-item/sponsorship/ …Show this thread -
It would mean a lot to me if you helped my friends in the
#Boston theater community salvage their losses by donating to the Theater Community Benevolent Fund. Click the link here:http://tcbf.org/?page_id=13Show this thread -
It would mean a lot to me if you helped out my friends in the restaurant / bar industry in
#Cambridge#Somerville and#Boston by donating to the@GregHillWEEI foundation's Restaurant Strong Fund Link here: https://www.thegreghillfoundation.org/donations/restaurantstrongfund/?fbclid=IwAR1Y7Jn_pAFnyFslt9s981_i1JYE2r0SxOpYiWtqBAUZjJVhZGkmxwJL_ig …Show this thread -
It would mean a lot to me if you could help out my friends in the
#Boston music industry by chipping in to the Boston Music Maker Relief Fund: https://www.therecordco.org/relief?fbclid=IwAR3AFOQgqGzxWIEMin9276SD6iIlAZHk1-7J0emrVGtv81AqGkWHkvxVhDQ …Show this thread -
It would mean a ton to me if you supported the following
#Cambridge#Somerville#Boston businesses in any way you can:@bukscambridge@FieldPubDrink@AllStarPizzaBar@moonarestaurant@BrattleTheatre@trinastarliteShow this thread -
@improvasylum @biddysboston@bukscambridge@pourboston @McGreevysBoston@BostonPedicab@TheFreedomTrail@730MassAve@csflorist@tresgatosTV@BillsBarBoston@booksmithtweets@thecoolidgeShow this thread -
I can't forget my people in
#WesternMA@thecrestroom@MajesticWSpfld@SpfldMuseums@SonsofErinWstfd@PlatterpusToo@dirtytruthbeerShow this thread -
Look at the beauty that all of this became: http://www.danajaybein.com/coronavirusrhapsody.html …
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My beloved second home
@inmanoasis is closing indefinitely. I'm selling DJB t-shirts to benefit my IO family while they're out of work. Please support me by supporting my friends. I love you.https://www.bonfire.com/djb-tees-for-inman-oasis-1/ …Show this thread
End of conversation
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