This thread really took me back. I remember consciously fighting against this particular pressure but really... being the Only One gets you a lot of material benefits I’d be stupid to deny... but also a lot of really strange psychological contortions.https://twitter.com/clintsmithiii/status/964525490429153281 …
It’s very strange when the people you have to rely on for your interpersonal needs have so many fundamental misconceptions about you.
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Forgive the metaphor but it’s almost a kind of dysphoria. It’s not looking in the mirror and seeing the wrong thing it’s looking in other people’s eyes and seeing that they see you in a really fucked up, wrong way. Even people you’re really, really close to.
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That’s a deep tension for the culture to solve. But it’s also a cultural problem and I have access to white capital because I perform white culture pretty well because the way I grew up it was sink or swim for getting along with the whites so... here we are! The money’s nice!
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