Okay shit one serious rebuke to the Dudes Who Have Feelings About Cat Person: surely you noticed that on multiple occasions she is afraid for her life. Dimly afraid, but afraid. And yet you expect emotional honesty from this woman. Really?
I think, as long as you benefit from a given privilege, you also hold a responsibility that comes from that privilege. If I have more power than a given white person in a given interaction, they still have moral obligations that flow from their white privilege. Ditto for men.