Connor RatliffVerified account

"You can't break the country!" says @realDonaldTrump, after taking a deeply divided country and fully breaking it.

pizza and multiple cream sodas and a milkshake and brownies and i am just going to pretend that the news said we had to eat all this to prevent the spread of the coronavirus

To anyone who ever suggested that Trump's election was going to be "good for Comedy" I want to be on record as one of the many who emphatically said at the time "no, it will not be."

There are a bunch of people I'm likely never gonna see again who it never occurred to me that the last time I saw them was the last time I was ever gonna see them except maybe in a facebook group or something Not a unique phenomenon & nothing as bad as a death but it still sucks

Anyway, I want to feel good about the past and not think too much about the future that might've been. Also, now I don't have to ever be funny anymore so I will be something else instead. I have seen lots of people all over the place not being funny and it looks fine.

I started at creative rock bottom in 2009, and @ucbtny encouraged me after over a decade of nothing but rejection. I learned more craft in the classes at UCB than I did studying drama for 5 years in 2 countries.

Not optimistic for the future and have no interest in thinking of the silver linings or being hopeful about stuff. I prefer to manage my expectations and **maybe** feel less bad down the road, for the long haul. It was a good run of shows.

Not sad. That's the weird part. I knew this was gonna happen as soon as everything broke. Emotions shut down WEEKS ago Grateful for the decade of experience, for being able to put on tons of shows w/o having to lose money on them, for the ppl I got to meet & do comedy with

I tell you what, though: I am going to eat a whole entire pizza and I do not care if that is a bad idea. I might do it tomorrow, too. YES AND another pizza.

"We're all just shambling about as walking elegies to a past that is no longer possible." - Zach Woods, during a phone call several weeks ago. I told him I was gonna write this quote down because I thought it was worth remembering.

Oh well.

Also, I kept trying to quote Springsteen in that article and they kept editing it out. Everything dies, baby That's a fact But maybe everything that dies Someday comes back. It's a VERY big "maybe" and right now I am not inclined to be optimistic about anything. Stay safe.

Also, pre-emptively: If ANYONE thinks I am in the mood for ANY kind of debate on ANY subject, just a heads up that they can fuck the fuck off and go fuck themselves forever. Go talk to anyone else. I'm not interested.